The Good in You | h.s. au

001.

Here is a playlist for you to enjoy as you read on :-) 

What Now by Rihanna

Pretty Hurts by Beyonce 

Give Me Love by Ed Sheeran

Bretahe Me by Sia

These Four Walls by Little Mix

Skinny Love by Birdy

Not About Angels by Birdy

( A few of these songs are older but they go with the chapter which was inspired by the inroduction of Titanic!! )

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I couldn't take it. All those damned closed minded people and their shiny white teeth. The bobby pins in their heads...their empty heads. Sitting at that table, holding hands with Edward, it opened my eyes. I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't marry a man I didn't love for my paren'ts benefit. I wouldn't. He was twenty seven and I was newly twenty. Not that I was judging him for his age or appearance. He had the face of the godess with the heart of the devil. The worst thing about him were his hands. They were so heavy...and teasing. He'd squeeze the side of my body and pull me closer when we had conversations, particaully rubbing in what would happened if I told someone what he had done to me. 

Hit me.

Struck me.

Beat me.

Whatever you wanted to call it, he had. In a drunken state but none the less, he was wrong and I was afraid. It added to the pressure of life that I carried around everyday- trying to hold on for the few people I cared for- but I couldn't any more. That decision had come after my sixth glass of champange, and maybe the bubbly was getting to me but I knew that in my heart it was my time. 

Now here I was, dragging my dress against the dirty grass, holding the front up to quicken myself. I dumped my trashy white, high heels at the party. My feet were aching and my head was thumping but no way in hell was I stopping. If I did, I would chicken out. I didn't want to chicken out. I'm ready. I know I am. Ready to leave Edward, ready to leave my parents, ready to leave my society and the heartaches of fake love; given and recieved.

The end of water was just as I remembered it. Crystal blue with white stripes on the moonlight following off of it. It was beautiful and that's why I had choosen this place. It had no special background to it; I'd only visited a few times within the years we've lived here though the beauty of it never left.

I felt like I was being mocked, call me crazy but I was. My tears fell into the body of water and I'm sure the mascara had ran off with it aswell. Eyeliner and all. My breathing was embarassing and thank goodness no-one was around to hear the sounds I made. 

You can't back down now. I'm coming grandma, hold on.

To say I jumped in head first was a lie. I took my precious time. Holding my breath and trying to flow with the moment. It was my last night and I wanted it to feel like more than it had. The feeling of mockery was shallowing me up and dumping me back into my shoes. I was being laughed at by myself through a two sided mirror. On one side I was going to jump and on the other side she laughed because I was still undresseing.

Here I was about to jump to my death and drown, but I felt like I wasn't doing it for myself. I knew what I wanted but it felt like it was for them.

The people inside who were toasting to new beggingings and fucking in our spare rooms. They weren't looking for me and they probably wouldn't care when they found the body. When I'm gone, they'll make post about me on their blogs but they won't show at my funeral.

In my bra and underwear, I stood at the edge of my cliff, looking down into crashing waves that would soon become my new home. Eyes closed, left foot walking onto the edge and slipping onto the ground of air...

"Ma'am...I'm going to have to ask you not to jump." The voice behind was deep and coated in worry.

"Go back inside!" I said. "I swear to God, I'll jump!"

"I know you will-" 

"Shut up! Don't mock me or interrupt me! Just- leave me alone, I'm going to do it whether you leave or not." I stepped farther, seconds away from my fall of death when I heard a zipper sound.

Turning around, I saw the man in a thick coat and a janitor's outift without shoes and now without a jacket.

"Then, dag'gonnit, I'm going to have you go with you." He repiled.

"Who are you!? Go back to sweeping the stairs, you shouldn't be out here!...Go away! You're distracting me." This asshole couldn't even give me my own last few moments to myself.

"Why did the dinosaur cross the road?" His top came over head swiftly as he tossed it aside.

I turned my face a bit, honestly astounded by his attempts to grab my attentions.

"Are you fucking serious right now?" I frowned at him.

"Because chickens hadn't evolved yet." 

"Listen!-" I took one step, turning around to confront the man before I slipped. I hit my face on a near by rock and before I knew it, I was dangling over the water. My scream suprised myself only because the janitor had not been phased, rushng over to my rescue..Why was I screaming? I was going to jump, but not slip.

The slip wasn't exatly planned.

"I'm slipping!" Dispite the cool breeze of January's air, my palms were sweaty from before, I hadn't even noticed how cold I was until he grabbed me. His hands closed around mine squeezing them and I felt as if my knuckles might have broken. Quickly, he let go of my hands one at a time and moved them upwards. My arms instantly warmed up to his temptuature, taking it in as I panicked and swung my legs.

"I won't let you go! But you gotta help me, pull yourself up. Come on-you got it."

Just as my eyelids dropped as I gave up hope in my weak limbs and his frozen ones, I felt a patch of rough,cool grass under me. He was grunting and I was panting, both out of breath and hearts racing.

"Next time you plan on jumping over the cliff, make sure you do it when my shift's over please." The man rubbed his pale hand over my shoulders before he tossed the jacket onto me and kneeled.

"You want me to help you get dressed? I don't think anyone would fancy seeing us undressed while laid out here. Plus, this is your engagment party." The janitor had slipped on his outfit just as he had taken it off, stealing glances at me as he did so.

I couldn't move from my spot but he was just going along with the rest of the night.

That had actually just happened. A bad attempt, a fail. Someone would know what had happened on this night and he'd probably run his mouth for a quick buck.

"Please don't tell. Please, please, I'll pay you." The words tumbled from my mouth as my mind shifted around in fear of my people finding out.

"I won't. Our secret okay? Just don't pull that shit again, you scared the hell out of me on my first day here." His green eyes stared at me, waiting for a response.

All I could do was nod, afraid to speak up. But naturally, I found my voice in the darkness of it all.

"Who are you again?"

"I'm Harry Styles, the new janitor."

"Faye Hart."

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WELL GOT DAMN THAT WAS THE FIRST CHAPTER. Was that long or short? I'm not sure because I'm typing on my computer and the editor looks different than published but yeah- wow that was a mouth full. What did you guys think!? I'm actually proud of that intro.I promise everyone chapter won't be as slow as that. I would love if you guys voted and comment just so I can know what to fix :-) If you don't it's all good! 

I'll still love you the same <3

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