Addicted to you and there's nothin' I can do

Chapter 34

"I'm so sorry, Madison, but you know what? Fuck him, if he cheated on you he ain't worth it" Sarah said empathetically as she looked down at me with a small smile.

"I hat-hate him, I fucking hate him" I breathed out my voice cracking.

But what I hated even more was the fact that even though I hated him, I still somehow still love him, I still fucking love him.

But I had decided, I needed a break. A break from him. To find myself again. To find out what to do with my life.

So after half an hour of fucking whining about everything, I got my ass up, borrowed the best looking clothes in Sarah's closet — since all my stuff still was at Jah's — and had on some bomb ass make-up. If I was going to confront Trippie it wouldn't be while looking like a god damn potato.

Sarah drove me there and insisted to stay in the car. She was so motherfuckin' scared of what would happen. I think she was expecting the worst, but then again so was.

Only seconds later, I was inside of the house, storming my way into Trippie's room. He wasn't there. So quickly I started to pack my shit up, kinda relieved that he was no where to be seen. Well, that relief didn't last for long.

"Jesus, baby, where the hell have you been? I've been worrying mad, I thought you were fucking hurt or some. You didn't answer any of mah calls or my texts" Trippie breathed out as he walked up to me. Putting both his hands on my cheeks.

"D-don't you fucking tou-touch me, Trippie" I answered angrily. Removing his hands, my eyes beginning to become watery. I refused to look at him, I just kept on packing my stuff.

"What's up with you?" He asked, sounding confused as he tried to make me look at him.

"What's wrong with me? Fuck, really? What's wrong with me?" I replied in disbelief.

He then caught me of guard by grabbing me by my wrist, making me turn around and for the first time that day, we made eye-contact.

"Madison, just tell me what the fuck is goin' on. You know you can talk to me bout everything. If there's something wrong you gotta tell me so I can at least try and help you fix it" He said studying my face for any sign. But when he looked at me, the only thing he could see was pain and hurt.

"Oh, but you see, Trippie, the damage is already done" She breathed out. "I kn-know it...I know what you've been fu-fucking doin' when you aren't with me"

I wasn't talking about the fact that Lil Pump told me that the whole plan to drug me was Trippie's because that I didn't believe for a second. He also had no proof.

What I was talking about was the other thing....

"What the hell are you talkin' about?"

"Are you really that much of an asshole that you couldn't even have fucking admit it to me when it happened, or have there been countless times?" I asked sadly and as I looked into Trippie's eyes I saw nothing but confusion.

"What the fuck are you on? Admit what?"
He questioned. And he was starting to become real mad, I could see it.

"That you fucking cheated on me, you cheated on me. And the worst part is that I really have been going around thinking you loved me but clearly I ain't enough, I've probably never be" I yelled out as tears started to escape my eyes.

It was only first then that Trippie let go off my wrist.

"H-how did you find out?" He asked looking down onto the floor, not daring to look up at me anymore.

"Un-fucking-believable" I laughed bitterly. I packed the last of my shit into my two bags and lifted one on my shoulder while holding the other one as I said. "I don't want anymore to do with you, I can't even look at you right now. I really loved you, I did. But apparently I shouldn't have. There's no more us anymore Trippie, just you and me. You made sure of that"

And at those words, and as I walked away Trippie felt totally and utterly heart-broken and disgusted by himself as he stood there in the middle of the room, all by himself.

I really loved you. I did.