im learning to love myself in this one

HELD

I've been stuck in this place,

Hiding behind these four walls,

Blank slates,

I'd paint pastels across them

If my hands weren't so heavy.

I've been here too long,

I've been here too long!

My sense of reality is fading.

Is this weighted heart real?

My sense of right and wrong is fading.

If I were to break these too-heavy bones,

Would that be wrong?

If I were to paint these walls with colors,

Would that be right?

This universe isn't all there is, you know.

I want to mold my heart into

Gold so someone will love me.

I just want to be held like there's no tomorrow.

I just want to be held like I'm endless.

I just want something

Other than these four walls

To hold me.