You Are No Longer Alone

Recollection

Kwonjoo hesitantly says that she doesn't clearly remember anything from that day and her team doesn't want to force her recalling any terrifying moments happened in that abandoned studio. They let her sleep for few more hours before her physiotherapy session starts at 1 pm. 

She toss and turns but sleep still doesn't want to take her away. So she just stare at the blue sky outside, vast and empty like an immense space that needs to be filled with something. It looks incomplete. Just like her heart. It miss a part and she knows what it is. Clearly. But she can't do anything about it.

And the dream still visits her occasionally, in every deep sleep that strikes after a dose or two of that strong pain killers. She always wakes up drenched in tears. White knuckles and tense, struggling hard to press the emotions. She keeps pushing it down, deep into the farthest part of her heart but she never succeed. She miss the person, the voice and the connection she had with him.

"Where are you?" she whisper to a particular no one, wishing for an answer that she definitely knows she will not be getting.

She push herself to sit. Letting the thick blanket fall onto her lap. The liquid drop from the sterile container that hang on the IV pole beside her bed creating a constant dripping sound, almost in unison with the clicking hands of the clock at the wall.

Tick.
Tock.
Tick.
Tock.

"tick... tock..." She copy the sound and the feelings hit her again.

She remembers the time when she spent a brief elevator ride with him, after solving the case at the apartment near the Poongsan Police Station. He didn't say anything, only the cracking sound with every flooring; 22, 21, 20 and it ding at floor 19. The door opened but no one was there so he pressed the button to make it close again. The light above them enshrouded his figure with a pensive sadness. She never took a look closely at how sad this man looked from behind. He is so tall yet seem so weak from this perspective, as if he wore a heavy veil of melancholy and deep disappointment. He never wears anything with color but black, enhancing the dark ambience that surrounds him. She lifted her hand slowly, to reach his shoulder but the door opened, and he walked out, Leaving a trace of his scent inside the giant metal box, and she wondered how he managed to keep walking so straight despite having an enormous amount of burden on his shoulder. She wanted to help the man.

"Team Leader Do wherever you are right now, I hope you are somewhere safe. Just...be safe..."

---

"There was only me and Kaneki." She lies, Kangwoo was there, "I don't remember anything after Kaneki attacked me." another lie, Kangwoo grabbed the collar of Kaneki's expensive suit and threw him hard onto the floor. The loud sound whenever them both hit the ground linger still on her ears, like a nightmare that refuses to leave.

"Team Leader Do sent us the address. We thought he will be there, somehow."

Kwonjoo avert her gaze somewhere. Eunsoo is staring a hole into her eyes and she can't help herself but looking away. The girl is trying to dig the truth. Maybe Eunsoo knows Kwonjoo is hiding something.

"Why did you go there alone without telling us? It's very dangerous, you know that." Eunsoo shift slightly on her seat, she looks restless.

"I know." For a second time, she is being hesitant about what to answer, "I was just being too rush myself. I was wrong. I know that. I am sorry."

Eunsoo eyes turns soft at the word 'sorry' and Kwonjoo isn't sure if she really wants Eunsoo to not know about the truth. Will this protect him, by telling this lie, or should she tell the team and ask for their help?