D. A. B. I. [COUNT TO TEN FICVERSE]

Research Hour: Affairs With Patients

He'd done something completely unexpected. Unexpected, out of character, totally wrong by all definitions of the word. Item five was a royal mess. He had to talk to someone about it. He had no idea who to talk to about it. Well, there was one person, but didn't he just decide not to bother him anymore? Shouto had to get his act together. He stood outside Touya's door. Determined not to knock. Determined to walk right back to his room and forget that he even thought about talking to Touya.

The door opened.

Touya blinked. He was just getting ready to leave. Shouto shouldn't bother him. He should let him leave. That's what he should do. But, the question still escaped his lips. He was comfortable around Touya. "May I...talk to you?"

"You can always talk to me, Shouto," he smiled. "Why don't you come inside?" He took a step back. He allowed Shouto to enter. The standard scene. He sat at his desk chair. He swished back and forth. Shouto sat on the bed. He shifted awkwardly. The silence killed him. Well, since he was already here, he might as well talk about it. This must be how a patient feels.

"Touya," he paused. How could he even begin to explain what had happened between him and Izuku in that bathroom stall? "I did...a thing...and I'm not sure it was the right thing to do."

"I can't exactly give you advice if you don't give me more to work with." Touya had a point. Of course he had a point. Shouto needed to say more than that. What were the right words? It wasn't exactly sex. That sounded so wrong. He needed to make it sound a bit less wrong.

"I had an affair with a patient," he finally said.

"Wait, you're telling me, you fucked one of those wackos?"

"Not quite, but in the same variety," Shouto sighed. At least he was finally talking to someone. Now he wouldn't have to internalize everything again.

Touya laughed. Touya laughed at him. That's rude. "I can't believe someone so glued to the rule book went and did something so scandalous! Every doctor here has done that at least once. We get so used to being stuck here we forget that the outside world is a place. Don't worry about it. There are far worse things that could've happened," Touya assured. He was having a grand ol' time over there making fun of Shouto. Shouto frowned.

"It's not something so trivial. I'm betrothed to Momo Yaoyorozu after all." Their engagement was arranged. Neither of them actually wished to marry the other. But, Shouto still felt obligated to be faithful. It was part of his personality. How would he explain, should he have to, that he had a sexual encounter with one of his patients? There was being married to your work...and then there was being married to your work.

"You're in an arranged agreement for the purposes of our father. Momo herself has told you on multiple occasions that you in no way have to be faithful to her. She is still trying to convince her parents to end the whole ordeal." Touya had a point. Shouto knew, in his mind, that he had a point. He'd tried to convince himself of that very same point on multiple occasions. But, the words of 'marriage engagement' haunted him to no end.

"Listen, Shouto," Touya folded his hands, "having sexual encounters is a part of being a homo sapien. They're natural things. People place way too much value into them. I understand that you want to save them for someone you care about but denying yourself doesn't equal purity. It's just denial, pure and simple." Touya had a way of sounding wise even when his wisdom didn't make a whole lot of sense. Was that an admirable quality? Perhaps not. But, it did have a way of making Shouto feel better.

"Thank you," Shouto bowed. He stood up and walked to the door. He had things to do. He couldn't sit here chatting all night. Before exiting, however, he turned to look back at Touya. "I'm sure I don't need to tell you this. But, please don't speak of this conversation to anyone." He knew Touya wouldn't. Touya was his older brother. His one friend. Shouto trusted him with everything. Touya trusted Shouto with nothing.

"Your secret is safe with me, my darling brother," Touya smiled. The door closed. Now all Shouto had to do was come up with a satisfactory apology for Izuku. Sleeping was not a word that existed in his vocabulary tonight. How did Izuku feel about the whole ordeal anyway? Shouto tried not to think about it. The scene kept popping up in his head. The way Izuku looked. His facial expressions. The strangest logic Shouto used to keep him from going Deku.

"I'm despicable," Shouto decided. "I wouldn't blame him if he hated me."