Frozen

Chapter 18)

Brianna

I woke up and knew immediately I wasn't at home. I blinked several times, looked around, and realized that Barney and I had fallen asleep in his office. There was someone banging on the door, and that was what had woken me up. I sat up and looked at the position we had fallen asleep in. I was lying down with one hand tangled in Barney's hair and the other one around his shoulders, and he had his head resting on my stomach, his arms wrapped around my upper thighs.

He was still fast asleep.

I moved carefully to try and not wake him up and he was completely dead weight, which was weird because he always woke up whenever I moved.

I got up and answered the door to a worried looking Hawk.

"Hey is everything okay?" he asked, trying to look around me to Barney.

"Yeah, we just fell asleep, what time is it?" I asked.

"It's only been like half an hour, don't worry."

He paused and seemed to gauge my expression before continuing.

"Barney has some seriously messed up notions about himself," Hawk said.

"Yeah, I noticed," I mumbled, looking over my shoulder to my sleeping boyfriend.

"I can't tell you the whole story, but his dad...well, he wasn't the greatest guy, and-"

"Yeah, Barney told me," I said, giving Hawk a small smile.

Hawk paused and his expression was shocked.

"Everything?" he asked.

I nodded and leaned against the doorframe, smothering a yawn.

"Everything."

"It took him three years to give me even a hint of his home life," Hawk said in a hushed tone.

I shrugged and once again glanced at Barn.

"Okay, then you know that he had every right to be messed up. But Brianna, seriously, you have to roll with it. He's going to get like this sometimes, and you have to learn how to deal with him. When he wakes up, he won't remember anything, so you don't have to-"

"Wait, what?" I asked, suddenly wide awake.

"Yeah, whenever he wakes up after one of his...after he gets like this, he never remembers anything that went down. He'll remember coming into work, getting the letter from his dad, and he'll figure that he took a nap to take a break from thinking or something. He won't remember that he went batshit crazy."

"Should I tell him?" I asked.

"No," Hawk answered immediately, "I tried that once, and it just frustrates him to the point of being crazy again. Turns it into a vicious cycle, just leave it alone."

I stared at my feet for a long time.

"I can't decide if that's a good or bad thing," I said quietly.

"It depends on what happens while he's in that state. Normally, it's a good thing, trust me. Hey, Hazel and I are going to head out, I just wanted to make sure everything is okay."

"Yeah, we're good," I said.

Hawk glanced at Barney, smiled at me, then walked away.

I closed the door and took a deep breath.

Slowly, I made my way over to where Barney was and sat down next to him.

"Barney," I said, running my hand over his face and into his hair, "wake up, boo bear, time for the real world."

His eyelids fluttered and he blinked several times before turning sleepy, soft, warm baby blues on me. A lazy grin curled his mouth in a super sexy way and he took a deep breath and stretched out a little.

"Hey, baby," he mumbled, his voice rough and growly in a sleepy way instead of a mad way, which made me smile.

"Hey," I answered back.

He sat up and immediately pulled me closer to him before looking around.

"Wait, why the fuck was I asleep on the floor of my office?" he asked.

"I don't know," I immediately answered, extremely conflicted about lying to him. "I came here and Hawk said you got a really...upsetting letter and took a nap."

His face immediately darkened and he nodded.

"Right, how could I forget?" he asked.

"What happened?" I asked, cupping the back of his neck.

"I got a letter from my dad," he said scrubbing a hand over his face, "he's out of jail and wants to have dinner with me."

"Are you going to respond?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Fuck, no," he growled. He kissed my forehead and got up, bringing me with him. "I was done with that fucker a long time ago and that's never going to change."

"I don't know what I would do if my father contacted me," I admitted.

He paused and looked at me.

"Well, I hope that you would tell me so I could deal with it," he said, sounding a little put off.

"Well, I mean, I can fight my own battles Barney. I'm not weak," I said, taking a step back.

"Baby, I'm not saying you're weak, but-"

"No," I cut him off, my voice sharp, "there is not but. I spent a long time being powerless, it's important to me that you know that I can take care of myself."

"Of course you can take care of yourself," he said in a placating tone as he pulled me back to him, wrapping both arms tightly around my lower back. I can grudgingly put my hands on his chest and sighed. "And you are anything but weak, darlin, but I don't want you to have to take care of yourself. As your boyfriend, it's my job to protect you."

My eyebrows drew together.

"Your job? Well, I'm sorry being my boyfriend feels like a job to you, but-"

"Stop twisting my words," he said, his head coming closer until he was so close I couldn't see anything but blue. "It's my job, but it's a job I asked for. I wanted it, and you gave it to me, so now it's mine, and I'm not giving it back."

You shouldn't have let me in Brianna, you should have kept pushing me away.

I grinned past the flash of pain that came with the memory of his words. Words, he didn't mean. Words he couldn't have meant.

"Well, as long as you're having fun," I said in a light voice, buttoning up his shirt and straightening his tie.

"What the fuck happened to my vase?" he asked in a funny voice, staring at the vase and the wall.

"No clue," I said with a small smile, averting my eyes by pretending to be flattening his collar. When I finally looked up, he was eyeing me with a suspicious look on his face, so I brightened my smile and his expression softened.

"How long was I sleeping?" he asked.

"Well, I got here about half an hour ago, and you were sleeping then, so I don't really know. But, I am half an hour late for my shift, and my boss is not the type to let something like that slide," I said, widening my eyes sincerely.

He smirked and leaned down to give me a short, hard kiss.

"That's right," he mumbled against my mouth, "so get to work."

I grinned and grabbed the bag with my uniform and left the room to change. I turned around just before the door closed and saw Barney eyeing the vase, his expression calculating, but closed off.

When the door was shut, I leaned against the wall, thinking that this relationship was going to be harder than I thought.