Of Birds and Jokers

Chapter 14

    The lights were a bit bright for his tastes, but Robin supposed the blinding lights were part of an interrogation rooms charm. He couldn't say that he had been the one in handcuffs very often, either, but the League was just being cautious.
    Robin didn't see any point in trying to further get away from Superman, Batman, and Green Lantern. Aeithegetting involved with the Joker almost killing Batman, the teen was most likely even higher on their priority list than before. Robin was all the League had when it came to getting information on the Joker, and when someone had come as close to beating Batman as the clown did, they wanted to know as much as they could.
    So, after dragging the Joker over and securing him further, Robin was taken with them. All except Superman had been on high alert when the Green Lantern had encased the teen in his power. From there, Robin got treated to a flight in a green bubble, all vision and hearing blocked in order to keep secrecy. Which was quite pointless, as when Robin was set down and the bubble disolved, he knew immediately that they had taken him to Mount Justice.
    The rest of the League greeted them in the large cavern, and Robin had been quickly ushered into an interrogation room per Batmans orders. Figured that Batman would be the only one not to hesitate to shove a child into an empty, concrete room with only a two-way mirror, handcuffs, and a metal table for company.
    Yet, so far, no one had come in asking any questions. While a bit of a relief, the development also led to a very bored teenager. Robin sighed and rested his head in his palms. Really, he could have had it worse. At least the League seemed content enough to let him keep his mask, as there was no doubt Clark had already debriefed the rest of the heroes on everything he knew.
Just when Robin was contemplated picking the handcuffs on his wrists out of pure boredom, the door finally swung open. Robin straightened, expecting to see Batman, but relaxed when Superman drifted through the door.
The man looked uncomfortable, landing and gingerly sitting down on the chair opposite of him. Clark swallowed, clasping his hands together on the table.
Robin couldn't help but raise an eyebrow and smirk at the discomfort. There was a very real possibility that this was the first time Clark had ever interrogated someone who wasn't a known criminal. Robin's lips twitched even further up.
He was due for a little fun, wasn't he?
"'Sup" Robin's voice seemed to snap Clark out of his daze, and his eye refocused on the now confident teen.
"Hello." Superman cleared his throat before continuing. "Can you tell me your name, please?"
Robin pretended to think, even going so far as to lower his head so he could tap a finger on his chin. "Nah, don't think I can."
"Why can't you?"
"I'm sorry, sir, it's a matter of national security."
"Excuse me?"
"Don't you have super hearing? I think it might be malfunctioning." Robin yawned, leaning back as far as possible with his hands hand cuffed to the table.
Clark blinked at him, at a loss for words. Robin snorted and shook his head. He hadn't had this much fun in an interrogation in a long time.
Mostly because when it usually happened the other party wanted to learn League secrets and then kill him, but that wasn't important at the moment.
"Uh, I-my hearing is fine, actually." Clark finally muttered. Robin relished in the absolute confusion that radiated from him.
"Oh, cool. Wouldn't be fun to lose that. Or anything else, actually."
"Look, kid." Superman suddenly turned serious, leaning forward on the table. "We know that you and the Joker are connected somehow, but no one knows the specifics. He thinks you're Batman's son, right?"
"Funny, I only remember telling one person that little tidbit of info." Robin had to hold back a laugh as Superman's entire body tensed for a moment before relaxing once again.
"Yes, we managed to track down Clark Kent to see what he knew, as records showed that he visited you after being admitted to Gotham General."
"Hm."
Superman sighed as Robin offered up nothing else, and continued to plow through. "Is there anything else you can tell us about the Joker? Abilities, other motives, allies? Anything would help."
"I've already told Clark everything I know about his motives, and the only abilities he has is his ability to efficiently kill lots of people."
Superman looked a bit happier at that information, thinking Robin was finally ready to talk like civil people. The teen looked forward to dashing his hopes.
"Okay, that's good. Now, is there anything else we need to know about him?"
"Yeah; Wherever he is now, which I'm assuming is Arkham Asylum, is going to need a lot of bleach to clean up the blood when he escapes in a week."
"No one's ever escaped Arkham in that short of time."
"You've never met the Joker, though, have ya'?"
"You have, which is why your co-operation is essential to-" Clark was cut off as the door swung open, and the black shadow that was Batman slid into the room.
He had clearly changed suits, but was still carrying tension from the multitude of injurys. Robin quickly straighten his posture and slid a blank mask over his face.
Messing with Clark had been fun, but there was no way he'd be able to achieve that with Batman.
"Batman, I have it-" Superman started, going to stand, but was cut off by a withering Batglare.
"No, you don't, and I don't have time to watch you blunder through another minute. I'm taking over." Batman's eyes narrowed even more. "Out."
Superman simply sighed, not deeming the ensuing argument worth having. He cast a pitied look towards the teen, but was met with a blank face instead of the carefree, happy smirk he had just a few seconds prior. The man furrowed his eyebrows, but left regardless of his confusion.
When the door closed, Batman didn't sit down. He stayed where he was, lurking over the now silent, stone faced teen.
The man's stare was unwavering. "Who trained you." Robin remained silent. Batman's mask furrowed, his right arm reaching behind his cape to produce the utility belt that Slade had given him. "I know this belt. Did Deathstroke train you? Force you to be his apprentice?"
Robin still said nothing. He could see the twitch in Batman's chin that the teen knew meant he was getting irritated. Robin almost smirked, but then realized that whenever Batman got irritated during an interrogation, he also got violent.
"No, he didn't." Batman lowered his arm at those words, the whites of his cowl never breaking contact with Robins own.
"Then where did you get it."
"If you must know, it was a gift. And without it, you would be lying dead in that street." Robin ignored Batman's glare. "You're welcome."
"I didn't need assistance. You merely provided a distraction. Yet, if Deathstroke didn't train you, the question remains on who did."
"Who says I'm trained in anything?"
"Don't play dumb." Batman snarled. "I doubt Deathstroke would merely give away one of his belts to a random teenager. So, who exactly are you, and what is your connection to the Joker." Robin opened his mouth, but before he could say anything Batman growled "Aside from the obvious."
Now came the tricky part. What exactly could he say? Should he say anything at all? What would be believable enough?
Batman's glare continued as Robin mulled over his thoughts, trying and failing to come up with something that Batman would take as some form of truth. After more silence, Robin saw the slight clench of Batman's fists, and rushed to at least say something so the man wouldn't attack him.
Robin didn't need any more trauma, thank you. He already had quite enough.
"My name's Robin, and you're right; I am trained." the teen paused, trying to make his voice steady. After viewing Batman's form relax, he continued on what he hoped was a convincing explanation. "I can't tell you the name of who trained me, but it wasn't Slade."
"Why can't you tell me."
"'Cause I have rights to privacy." Batman's eyes narrowed on Robin unintentional sassy slip, so the teen quickly continued. "I would be betraying trust that I would rather keep, okay?"
There was a moment of silence before the man nodded. "Continue. What's your connection to the Joker."
Robin swallowed, hoping his answer had just enough truth in it to convince Batman and whoever else may be watching behind the mirror.
"I've known about him since I began my training. My mentor tried to keep me away from him because...well, he can be a bit much for anyone that tried to defy him. Nevertheless, I have still been forced to fight with him in the past, against my mentors wishes. He's completely unpredictable; the only strategy to use against him is the element of surprise. And even that doesn't work all the time."
"Why is the Joker insisting that you're my...son." Batman ground out. Robin took a deep breath, and just let the words flow.
"I'm not sure, alright? Maybe it's our similar fighting style, or maybe he knows who you are under the mask and we look alike; I don't know. But he's been going on about that idea for a while, and he won't stop until both of us are dead. Preferably in the same place, where he can watch, and slowly."
The man huffed, the forehead of the cowl scrutching and eyes averting to the floor. There was complete silence as Batman contemplated what Robin had said, and Robin studied his sorta-but-not-really mentor. All Robin could hope for was that his explanations were enough, that his skills in deciet managed to fool Batman (at least for the foreseeable future), and he did not decide to investigate the 'mentor' Robin had mentioned. That would be yet another awkward conversation.
"Do you have a safe place that we could escort you to." Batman suddenly announced, and Robin was torn between both relief and elation that he had pulled the wool over Batmans eyes. He had actually bested his mentor, in a dimension where the man had no idea who he was.
Robin tried not to let the pride go to his head.
Then Robin realized he had yet to answer, and that Batman was still staring at him. "Uh, does Deathstrokes haunt count?" Batman frowned even more. "I'll take that as a no."
"Is that the only place you know that would be...'safe.'"
"I mean, I held myself on the streets pretty well, but I doubt Supes' would allow me to just be thrown out." Robin smirked at the small scowl thrown his way. Now that the actual interrogation part was over, there was no harm in getting on the mans nerves a little bit, right?
"If that is true, that you have nowhere else secure, then you will stay here under the protection of the Justice League until this matter is completely resolved. Any objections?"
Robin tapped his chin in mock thought before throwing the most innocent expression possible onto his face. "As long as the Super Hero Club plays nice, and I get to keep my mask, I have no objections to having a bit of a vacation."
Batman already looked like he was regretting the decision, but before he could get in another word the door burst open to reveal the grinning face of Barry Allen, AKA The Flash.
"Don't worry, Bats, I'll take care of getting the kid settled in one of the empty rooms." the speedster rushed out, making a move towards Robin before freezing when Batman growled at him.
"Robin wil not be getting a furnished room. He will be staying in a holding cell, and that is not going to up for debate." The Flash frowned, placing a hand on his hip. Robin smirked, leaning back in his chair and preparing to watch the fight about rooms that would undoubtedly occur.
"C'mon, he's just a kid, not a criminal-"
"Children can be criminals-"
"He hasn't shown any sign of hostility towards anyone-"
"He refused to answer questions when Superman was interrogating-"
"That kid also probabl saved your life earlier-"
"Debatable, and Robin has also admitted to being trained-"
Frankly, the argueing was getting ridiculous. Robin saw both Superman and Diana, AKA Wonder Woman, hovering behind the Flash, looking like they also agreed with the speedster. Robin yawned as the two heroes continued to bicker, getting steadily louder as they defended their respective points. It looked like it was going to take a while.
Well, that was until Batman growled an "Enough!" that hushed the other hero. Taking a deep breath, Batman glanced at Robin, which the teen greeted with a tiny waved of his own, before turning back to Flash.
"Fine, he will be allowed a room. But that room will be completely secure, with no windows or large vents, as well as extra security locks on the door and surveillance inside the room." He turned back to Robin, deeply scowling at the teens crossed hands and innocent smile. "And you will never leave that room unless accompanied by a member of the League. Is that clear?"
Robin couldn't help himself. "Crystal clear, padre."
Batman looked one second away from strangling him when Flash was suddenly at Robins side, a hand resting almost protectively on his right shoulder.
"No problemo, Batman. This kid will never be out of our sight!"
Robin tried not to snort as Batman gave Flash a very unimpressed look before promptly turning and marching out of the interrogation room. He heard the speedster beside him let out a breath,and could practically feel the relief oozing from the mans body.
"So," Robin started as Clark entered the room with a set of keys, "when will I get to see the new digs?"

Okay, wow, I have absolutely no excuse for getting this up later than I really wanted to other than I have discovered that there is A LOT of Spideypool content on Ao3. Both the fluffy, adorable, superfamily kind and..uh...*cough*...not so PG kind.

So yeah, I'm a bit of a slut for any and all kinds of Spideypool content. Sue me. (But don't, cause I have literally maybe 200$ to my name)

Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Things get a bit fun from here on out before we get back to the more depressing stuff.

~RockinThatRobin