Stupid story's that don't matter

Uranus the not so great god

Here is a " accurate " history lesson, long ago there was a  god named Uranus and people now think that he was the god of the sky but I have been doing some research and I have found that he is actually the god of number two, feces or as a normal person would put it, god of poop. So in the year two billion b.c. Uranus was on a fly on his flying carpet made out of used toilet. So he landed at a mczues for some food and he ordered a bigzus because he was very hungry and hated healthy foods. After the meal at mczues Uranus's stomach didn't feel good. " MY POOP IS COMING " shouted Uranus and you see, every time Uranus poops every living thing everywhere has diarrhea. So when Uranus was on the toilet and the poop nuke dropped every one in old York city, not los Vegas and many other old civilizations that TOTALLY existed had a huge diarrhea storm, and when the smoke cleared the ground was disgusting and the people were SUPER sad and angry. And the gods tried to tell him that he was a god and if he eats ( which he didn't have to do ) it would equal total diarrhea destruction, but he WOULD NOT EVEN FRUNKING LISTEN. So then the people of old earth started to plot a dastardly plan would ABSOLUTELY KILL ALL THE GODS!!! ( except for the god of food, water, housing and everything they needed to live god because they were good gods for the obvious reasons ). The next morning zues woke up to brush his teeth but when he opened the urine toothpaste cap all that hapend was one measly disgusting arrow shot out and EXPLODED INTO BILLIONS OF TINY POOP PIECES. " UUUUURRRRRRAAAAAANNNNNNUUUUUSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!"
Boomed Zues as he picked out the poo pieces out of his hair with lightning strikes shaped into a hand. " yes oh grea... your covered in my creations... why? " the people from down bellow watched in glee as there amazingly disgusting plan was working PERFECTLY. " YOU MOTER FFFFFRRRRRRUUUUNNNNNKKKKKKEEEEEERRRRRR " those were the words all the gods said at once to Uranus. And you see when gods get angry they go absolutely BIZARRE and freak out like a rag doll in a air tunnel while drunk. And Uranus just was standing there looking at them freak out and absolutely destroy everything they ever built like sky walls and sky clouds. " WOW GUYS CALM DOWN I DIDN'T DO THAT " shouted Uranus while watching his friends go absolutely CRAZY. " YES YOU DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID " screeched zues as his thunderstorm powers were getting WAY out of control. THERE WAS LIGHTNING EVERYWHERE AND THE MAGICAL POWERS EACH GOD HAD WAS GETTING OUT OF HAND. " YOU ARE A MOTOR FRUNKING IDIOT, NOT A GOD " as the words rumbled through the air their powers got more unstable and then, A MASIVE THUNDER BOLT HIT URANUS AND THE STATIC LEFT BEHIND WAS ENOUGH TO. for some reason. BLOW UP ALL THE GODS. THE END