Warning, homophobia. It's a little bit sad so...
Enjoy !
Freddie is 17
Brian is 20
"I'm going Brimi!"
The brunet did not deign to lift his eyes from his cell phone and simply made a small wave of the hand to the young man who stood in front of the door of the apartment they shared.
Freddie felt his heart shatter. He opened the door and slammed it violently behind him, making Brian jump.
"But what's wrong with him ...", he mumbled as he put his phone next to him to stretch.
His eyes traveled the room before landing on a small notebook that was not in its usual place since he had never seen it before that day.
He grabs it, his fingers coming in contact with the thin gray blanket. A notebook of disconcerting banality. The brunet opened it with a little hesitation and began to read.
April 19th
It starts again...
Today they continued to make jokes about my sexuality. By force, I do not know if I have to laugh or keep quiet. They make fun of me saying that I'm going to cry but I'm not crying! I am tall now, I am 17 years old. I would like to shout to them that I am not the baby they see in me. I am a person who is looking for friends ...
"Freddie ... My God, why did not you tell me ?!" exclaimed the man turning the page.
May 4
Today I tried to talk to Brian about my problems in high school. I told him everything ... What they did to me, told me. That I had only one desire and it was that to die because ... I am useless.
And he laughed.
My heart tore up more, as if it were not enough already ...
I asked him what he found so funny and he showed me his phone because Chrissie had sent him a hilarious picture. How did you want me to laugh, I can not even smile anymore. He told me that I no longer had any humor and apologized for not listening to me.
You do not know how much I would have liked to cry in front of him, but I can not, he too will end up making fun one day. So I left, I do not even have the courage to face him.
"No Freddie, no, I'm sorry ..."
May 16
The school is nothing more than a building filled with shadows. The faces of people around me become blurry. It's only black shadows with red eyes that chase me for laughing at me ...
They hurt me but no one is there to worry about my condition. When I get back, Brian is often, all the time on the phone with his Chrissie. I do not even know what to think of their relationship. He keeps complaining that she is too sticky and that he would rather find someone else but he spends his days with her on the phone ...
"Fred, I do not like her for so long now ..."
June 1
Brian went to bed early tonight, he looked so sad ... But when I asked him if he was fine, he kept grumbling that everything was fine and he just wanted me to be quiet and that I leave him alone.
Every time he rejects me, my heart breaks into thousands of pieces. Because in spite of me, I worry for him whereas ... In the bottom I have no reason to worry for him because for him I am only a poor roommate.
When I think that at the beginning we were friends ...
The last writings dated from the day before. The brunet had to really take it upon himself to continue reading these words so sad, so depressing.
