Two Demons in the dark (completed)

Lost it all

Marshall

In his boredom, he created a story.
Then he called it "Truth" because that was the inspiration
and that was what it was all about
and that was the main point of the story.
and his producer gave him a film to direct
then his step-father hooted and cheered him on when his film came out.
Then he showed it to everyone he knew
That was the day he got a dog and named him truth.
Then he saw his mother for the first time in years
She was clean and had changed her life. And his friends visited him a lot
Then the subway girl smiled at him
Then he asked her on a date.  And his step-father called him everyday

And he was proud of him.

In his excitement, he created a story.
Then he called it "Summer" because that was what it was all about
and that was the inspiration
And that was the main point of the story
and his producer told him it was brilliant
The he gave him the number to a publisher.
Then his step-father didn't hoot or cheer him on when his book came out.
He didn't show it to anyone he knew.
That was the day that truth died.
Then his mother vanished
and his friend stopped visiting him because they were "too busy"
Then the subway girl danced with him under the stars because she liked him.
And his step-father stopped calling him everyday, but he was still proud of him.

In his confusion, he created a story.
Then he called it "Heaven; a myth?" because that was what it was all about
and that was the inspiration
And that was the main point of the story
and his publisher told him it was breathe taking. Then he gave him a surprise from New York Times
And his step-father didn't hoot or cheer for him when he got "best seller" Award
And he didn't even go to the red carpet event
He didn't talk to him for a while. Then he forgot about his mother and he no longer had friends. The subway girl broke up with him because she met another guy. And his step-father stopped calling him everyday and he was no longer proud of him.

That's why in his depression, he wrote another story and he called it "Suicide" because that was what it was all about and that was the inspiration
And that was the main event in the story.
and he told himself it was a best seller and gave himself a noose, and draped it around his neck.
And he hooted and cheered himself on because no one would be proud of him because this time, no one would see him to tell him how great his books really were.

He stepped aback in his skin and looks at his writing. The words that occupy the space in front of him seemed foreign. There are somethings in his life that no one will ever know about because he refuses to trust. The abundance of thoughts that congregate in his head are no match for the ones he puts on paper. The words that his brain formulate and his mind alliterate are too much for human comprehension. After all, he was the only one that these things were for. Escape? Everyone needs one of those. The things that eat you up are the things you can control. He knows within himself that some where there is someone going through a similar struggle. He tries to be strong but sometimes the thoughts drown him, they drag him down and hold him under.

Nights of sleeplessness are what make them so strong. At one point his insomnia went away but dreadful days scare the sleep out of him. Once again, the insomnia is back and so are the inhabitants of his demonic brain. Even though he knows first hand the way drugs can affect a person, he found refuge in the white powdery substance he intakes through his nose. He doses on pain killers only to find out that they don't take away the physical or mental/emotional pain and deprivery he goes through consistently.

Marshall is in total denial about his feelings. He tells the world he's fine but within that simple sentence he's crying for help and he's screaming in agony.
He knows that these feelings are there but he tries not to face them, the pain is too much. Will it ever stop? Will the pain get better or worst? Will he ever find a cure? The torment of his multiple defining demons that go crazy inside of him. He's not crazy, or so he says, but he's been driven up the wall by many assholes that come in his life and swear to never leave. He hides the scars on his heart and arm because no one cares. No one understands. Marshall feels alone because he is alone. His pain is a direct result of anger. Anger at himself and his parents, may be even the world!

For the rest of his life, he would wonder how and why his father died. The police told him they found him dead with a gun shot wound to the chest. Marshall didn't believe that at all. He knew his father died for a reason and someone killed him. How? He didn't know but he wanted answers.

They did, however, give him something they thought belonged to him. It was a silver tag with his name inscribed in it. The back said "To my ride or die, Marshall M. -Big M and V." Who was "V"? Was that his mother? Did it leave a clue about his death? He had no idea but he will spend the rest of his life, if he have to, to find out what happened to his father and maybe find out about his mother.  Most of his life would be spent alone or with the loneliness of his thoughts. He was used to things being all about him and his dad that now, he had to step up and be a big brother to a child he doesn't even know, it's too much. He wouldn't dare tell the little boy they really aren't family, he knows how bad the loneliness is.