I couldn't breathe. I was vaguely aware of the rapid rise and fall of my chest, but I simply couldn't feel the oxygen flooding my lungs. The fingers on my left hand were curled tightly around the metal frame of the bed; so tight my fingertips were threatening to dent the cold, hard surface. I clutched desperately at my chest with my right hand as though it would help me to inhale.
The portly, female nurse took another hesitant step backwards, glancing anxiously between myself and Hyunjae. The technicoloured tourniquet hung loosely in her hand. Over my loud gasping I heard her say, "Should I administer a sedative?"
A sedative? No fucking way!
She turned and rummaged around in a draw and extracted a syringe. I was watching her thoroughly horrified as she pulled the plastic cap off the needle end. She then dared to take a step in my direction which consequently increased the severity of my anxiety attack ten-fold.
"Don't touch me!" I managed to spit out. My sweaty left hand couldn't keep a grip on the metal any longer so I let go of the bed and found myself waggling my finger at the nurse, trying in vain to stop her from coming any closer. I don't know why I thought that waggling my finger would make a difference, but I wasn't exactly thinking very rationally at that precise moment. I could feel my heart thumping loudly and painfully in my chest and was surprised it hadn't exploded yet. The nausea kept washing over me in erratic waves and I was physically trembling.
"Stop!" I gasped and sucked in a mouthful of air. I clenched my eyes shut as the room spun around me, despite the fact I was lying horizontal and not moving. "Oh, God."
Hyunjoon. Get. Yourself. Under. Control.
I seriously felt like I was about to die, or at least pass out. A second before I was about to resign myself to my black fate I felt something woolly and warm enclose itself around my left hand. The first thought that sprung into my brain was that a teddy bear had wrapped itself around my hand.
Yes, obviously I was not thinking very rationally at that exact moment.
Startled, I forced my eyes open and was ashamed to admit for a split-second I was still expecting to see a teddy bear. However, what I actually saw was so much better.
Chanhee was standing by my side holding my hand with both of his. He smiled reassuringly at me. "Calm down, Hyunjoon. Don't think about it. Just think about breathing. In, and out. Good! " He was breathing steadily for me and I found myself mimicking him.
In and out. In and out.
I felt my heart rate start to steadily make its way down and return to a normal resting rate. Once the oxygen was flowing freely to my brain again I noticed that Chanhee was wearing gloves. That's why I felt something warm and woolly around my hand. He was wearing the dark blue pair Kevin had given him yesterday. Kevin had randomly approached us and announced that God had told him to give them to Chanhee because apparently Chanhee would be needing them in the near future.
Chanhee had accepted them very graciously and thanked Kevin sincerely. I just shook my head and rolled my eyes, as I always did when Kevin relayed one of his 'messages'. Because, come on, it's bullshit.
Once I had completely calmed down the nurse stood by my side. "Shall we try again?" she asked, pushing the sleeve of my hoodie up.
"No!" I exclaimed wrenching my arm from her grasp and cradling it to my chest.
Oh had I mentioned I hadn't actually had the fucking blood test yet?
"Hyunjoon," Hyunjae scolded and I glowered at him.
"Hyunjoon," Chanhee said softly. His voice drew my attention immediately and I looked up at him. "It doesn't hurt, you know," he said earnestly.
"I-I-Yes! I know!" I said defensively. "It's just I don't like needles."
