I am your summer

Part I - TAYLOR - Chapter 2

Sitting across the table from Karlie, Taylor looks at the empty bowl in front of her and fiddles with the chopsticks next to it.

I have to tell her now. The more I put it off the more embarrassing it gets. She already won the Gold medal, there's nothing I would be distracting her from now. And we're flying home tomorrow, and New York is a big city, and if I embarrass myself too much, I can just delete her number and never see her again.

When she looks up, she sees Karlie's questioning gaze on her. She remembers the first time she was at the receiving end of her intense stare, like she has so often in the last four weeks. She shivers a little.

"Are you okay?" Karlie's voice is soft.

Taylor bites her lip. "Yeah."

"You seem nervous."

Taylor gives her a weak smile. Karlie is always so observant, so concerned. They've spent quite some time together in the last four weeks, and Taylor feels like they could be friends. But not until she gets this confession out of the way. Maybe it's not a confession. More of a reminder. Taylor can't believe that Karlie is so oblivious. She doesn't know how much Karlie drank that night and if she remembers it at all. But since the moment that Taylor realized who Karlie was, it has been on her mind.

No matter how embarrassing it's going to be, she has to tell her. Cara had only shrugged, not believing it would change anything, but Todrick had agreed. Taylor has been texting Todrick about it nonstop. Now she has the opportunity, sitting in this small Ramen shop that has the air conditioning turned up just a little too high, and she knows she will regret it if she chickens out.

"I have to tell you something."

Karlie tilts her head to the side a little. "Really? What is it, Taylor? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. It's not about me." Taylor sighs and lets go of the chopsticks to fiddle with the napkin instead.

"It's about us."

Karlie raises an eyebrow. Her demeanor tells Taylor nothing about if she knows what's coming or not.

"We ... we've actually met before. Last year, in the summer, too." Taylor thinks her heart is beating out of her chest, and she wipes her clammy hands on the napkin.

"Oh? Really?"

Taylor feels her heart sink. So Karlie doesn't remember. She just sits there, waiting for Taylor to continue. Taylor braces herself for the embarrassment.

"We, um ..." she clears her throat. "We ..." She can't do it. She can't say it. Karlie doesn't remember. She should have just pretended to not remember, either. But she's too far along now.

"We met? Where? I don't think I remember you. Did you interview me before?" Karlie asks innocently.

Taylor wants the ground to swallow her whole. She wonders if she digs deep enough, if she can dig a hole from Tokyo straight to New York to curl up in her bed and never talk to anyone ever again.

"No, we ... we met in a bar. Last summer. We ... dammit. We hooked up." There it is. Taylor feels her cheeks redden at her own words and averts her eyes from Karlie.

Karlie is quiet for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. "Oh. Yeah ... I'm sorry, I really did not remember you. I ... I do that quite a lot." She takes a sip of her cold oolong tea and looks at Taylor.

Taylor finally looks back. "Oh ... yeah. Well."

She doesn't know what to say. She has never been this embarrassed in her whole life. And Karlie doesn't seem to care, as if girls tell her that every other week. Actually, remembering the gossip article she read the other week, that doesn't seem to be so far-fetched. Taylor just happens to be one more.

"Yeah. I just thought I'd tell you. Because we've been working together, and hung out, and I didn't want it to be awkward." Taylor breathes out audibly.

Karlie grins. "It's okay. It doesn't have to be awkward, though you look quite embarrassed. It really doesn't have to mean anything. I'm sure it was good, because I do remember one bad hook-up very clearly." She gives Taylor a wink.

Taylor's cheeks grow even redder and she has to avert her eyes again.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable" Karlie says quickly and reaches out to touch Taylor's arm.

Taylor wishes that it didn't cause a spark of electricity to run through her body, but it does. She sighs, but manages to look back at Karlie and attempts a smile. Cara's words are echoing in the back of her mind.

"Yeah. It's okay. I just wanted you to know."

"Of course. I'm glad you did. It doesn't change anything, though. We're professionals." Karlie's voice is soft, but determined.

"Of course." Taylor finally gives a small smile.

They don't talk about it more after that. They finish their drinks, then leave shortly after and walk to the subway station together. Karlie returns to the Olympic Village to pack her bags for her flight back to the US the next day, and Taylor has a last meeting with Cara and the other journalists before she has to pack her bags, too.