Fearless (Bellamy Blake - Book 1)

Chapter 71

"Got any moonshine?" I push aside the fabric into Monty and Jasper's tent, startling the two.

"You're just in time." Monty replies, thankfully not questioning the nature of my request. "I just finished a new batch of Unity Juice."

I ignore his choice of name and hand over my cup, thanking them when it's filled to the brim with the toxic liquid. Jasper grabs the barrel and runs out of the tent, myself not far behind.

"WOOHOO! Monty strikes again!" He lifts the barrel up over his head as he moves to the centre of camp, the delinquents crowding round him for a taste. "We call this batch, Unity Juice!"

I take a rather large gulp of the drink in my hand, my face scrunching up as my taste buds disagree with the sharp taste of the alcohol.

"Woah." Clarke says as she comes over to me. "Rough day already?"

"I fucking hate Unity Day." I tell her as I discard my empty cup, walking away from her.

I pass the open tent with the comms unit airing Jaha's speech at the Unity Day Pageant, not bothering to stop and listen.

"Hey." Bellamy gives me a small nod as I approach him across the camp, one that I return wordlessly. He still has a few cuts on his face from the situation with Dax, but they're healing. "I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that you're not a fan of Unity Day?"

I'm quiet for a moment, letting memories of a knife flash through my mind as I stare out at the camp.

"Four years ago today I murdered my father," I say to Bellamy, finally looking up at him. He has a look on his face that I can't quite decipher, and I don't really want to. "So no, Bellamy, I'm not really a fan of Unity Day."

I walk away from him, taking a cup of Unity Juice out of the hands of a younger delinquent as I pass, ignoring their protests and profanities against me.

I spend most of the day by myself—which is actually how I spend most of my days now—but today it seems to be for an entirely different reason. Raven is busy in the weapons tent working with the bullets we have, and I haven't seen Finn all day.

My first selfish thought is that they're both avoiding me because they know about today, but the more rational side of me (which is currently being drowned in Unity Juice) knows that they're just busy.

Too busy for me and my problems, as always.

The camp's noise level has been increasing all day, after all, Unity Day is normally one for celebration. It's just too bad the Grounders don't know that. And since the guards on duty have taken it upon themselves to have a day off, I sit on a heap against the wall, gun in hand as the rest of the camp drink and talk and laugh and then drink some more.

It's been a few days since Bellamy and Clarke came back to camp armed with guns, which means it's been a few days since the Grounder that stuck a knife in Finn and that we tortured, escaped. Now, it's just a matter of time until the Grounders retaliate.

"A part of me wants to know why you did it."

I turn my head and watch as Bellamy Blake approaches me and leans against the wall beside me. Due to my position sitting down high up as he stands, the two of us are the same height, a rarity that I'll cherish.

"A bigger part of me...is too afraid to ask," he continues, "but if it'll help you, we can talk about it. About what happened."

"I don't like talking about it," I whisper.

"I know," Bellamy nods at me but his gaze is set on the camp.

We're both silent for a short while, soaking in the atmosphere of the campers around us. The sun has started to set which means fires are being lit, my eyes having to adjust between the bright flames and the dull blue above us.

"If you ever want to though, we can." Bellamy looks over at me, "Talk about it, I mean."

I look into his deep brown eyes, the same eyes that confuse me on a daily basis, but also calm me when I need. Those eyes are trustworthy and calculating at the same time and it's infuriating. I hate to admit it at times, but a part of me has trusted him from the moment we first met. Even when I found out he had a gun on the first night on Earth, I somehow trusted him with it.

I've trusted him to keep me in the loop with the goings on in camp, and he's made sure I'm included in major decisions.

I would probably say that I trust Bellamy Blake with my life.

So, that's why I nod, and say to him with every ounce of gratitude I can muster, "I know."