Sickness

Pain

'Mother' guided us through the long and dark hallways only giving us glances every now and again to make sure we were keeping up and also giving us the occasional toothy grin. After several minutes of us walking in silence she stopped in front of an iron door.

Placing her hand on a keypad, "This will be you two's room from this day forward. I suggest that you get some sleep because you will be needing it later." The turned around and began to walk off.

"Ma'am! What do we-!" Blade wasn't able to even finish his sentence before he went tumbling to the ground. 

'Mothers' heels dug into his ribcage almost threatening to break them in half, "What did you call me!?" She growled out her eyes bleeding red. 

"Mother!," I screamed as I stood straight and stared her in the eyes, "I think he said Mama! It's another form of Mother. I'm sorry if I sound impolite towards you." My posture was beginning to crumble underneath her intense stare. 

Then as if nothing even happened she smiled and removed her foot. I rushed to pick up Blade then felt something warm trickling down the side of my head. Freezing I put my hand to the warmth and pulled my hand back to see blood. With shaking hands I stared at her.

"He might have said Mama, and I shall forgive him for this but I must punish you for rudely interrupting me and also accusing of having poor hearing." She smiled and stepped towards me and grabbed me by my hair.

Kicking and screaming I was pulled farther down the hall leaving Blade behind as he cried. In my mind I cursed myself for my soft heartedness but seeing him crying and in pain I knew I would have done it again.

"Dear daughter I hope your not weak to pain or the sight of blood, but seeing as how you scream so sweetly and quiver as the sight of your own blood you must be."

With the same process as our room she opened a door, and oh how I wished I never spoken at that moment. Before me was hell itself. 

For the next 2 months I survived. I trained and I killed. I tortured and was tortured.  For 2 months I wept myself to pain as my back, head, stomach and legs bleed. 

The first week was the hardest 'Mother' completely beat into fear, hatred, and obedience.  I fear that I might have lost my sanity several times, but I do know that I became broken when I killed for the first time. 

She was maybe around 12 or 13. She was sweet, kind and untainted. She was my safe haven, and I think 'Mother' knew this, but she let it play out. She let me form a bond with the girl, Alice. 

Then about a month into my "training" she handed me a knife, and brought me into a room and there sat someone tied, gagged and with their head bagged sitting in a chair. 

'Mother' whispered dark words and evil promises into my ear like the devil himself. She promised that if I drove this knife into this person's chest I could leave. That my "training" would be done. 

So I did. I plunged my knife into the person's chest without a second thought.  I was glad I would be freed, that is as done. Until she took the bag off, and I saw her. I immediately felt cold and empty.

For another month I was stuck. When is was finally able to go back I saw Blade. The one whom I promised to myself to protect and I felt ashamed. I felt useless.

I felt tainted.