Monique

Popping Pills

Monique takes pills.

She pops six a day: three in the morning, one after school, and two at night. She doesn't know why she takes them. Her parents tell her it's because the doctor said so.

Monique fills the glass with water and takes a pill from its plastic bottle. It's big, shiny and green. She hates it. It tastes like acid in her mouth. She quickly swallows it and sculls some breakfast juice to rid her mouth of the aftertaste.

She glances at her phone as it vibrates on the bench top. She picks it up and places it down. It's a text from her mum telling her she's booked an appointment with a psychiatrist. Monique places the plastic bottle back in the fridge. She doesn't need a shrink. She doesn't need someone to sort through her problems. She's more than capable of doing it herself.

She heads upstairs and changes out of her uniform into thick trousers and a t-shirt with Swipe Me written on it. She takes a ten dollar note from her wallet, puts on her converse and heads out the door.

The shops are only a ten-minute walk from her house. They are all arranged in sequential order: the fish and chips shop, target, the art store, the news agency, the sweet shop, Coles and Bakers Delight. The automatic doors open, welcoming her into the arms of a heater. She passes the news agency and quickly looks away when she notices the manager looking at her with pointed eyes. The woman, whom she calls PMS, has always hated her for some reason. Monique is still yet to find out why. Maybe it's because she's never bought anything from the shop. It's not her fault a small packet of lollies cost five dollars instead of two dollars fifty, or that their books are over ten dollars.

She enters the sweet shop. It's heaven. Stacks of sweets, lollies bubble gum and chocolate are stacked on shelves and counters. It's a self-serve shop. That's why she loves it. And it's cheap as well. That's a bonus. She takes a large candy bag and begins filling it with chocolate, sour worms, gummy bears, jelly babies, chocolates and white chocolate fudge. She pays the Asian lady seven dollars and heads out of the shops into the cold weather.

She dislikes winter. Her hair becomes frizzy. It turns into an ice sculpture when wet and takes a long time to dry. She can't wear her shorts and she gets severe colds. But on the other hand, she doesn't have to shave her legs.

She turns left at the end of the street. This is where the suburb ends. She's in the outskirts now. No one ever wanders there. They stick to their nice, cosy homes, delighting in their apple pies and warm custard. Dead leaves crunch under her feet as she makes her way through the mangled mess of trees, vines and thorns. She's glad she wearing trousers and a long sleeve shirt. There's a high chance of being hurt out here whilst alone. She should have probably used the short cut. Oh well.

She turns at the final tree and smiles when she sees what she's looking for. A large patch of grass is only a few feet from her. A small lake lies in front of the grass. Ducks sometimes come there to swim and play around. And the good thing is, no one else knows about this place. This is Monique and John's territory.

Monique sits on the grass and begins eating a sour strap. She loves the way the sour taste tingles in her mouth before the sweet strawberry flavour takes control.

She looks at the sky. It's blue. There are no clouds today. It's just her, her sweets, the lake and the sky. She takes a chocolate and begins eating it. It's white chocolate, her favourite and it doesn't take long for her to devour it whole. She leans back on the grass chewing some gum. The grass is wet from the rain that fell earlier but is soft against her skin. Her eyes close as a cool breeze blows across the secluded spot. Strands of hair touch her face as they do their dance in the breeze.

"Monique." Her eyelids fly open at the sound of her name. It can't be. She turns her head to the side and sees him smiling at her. He's lying beside her. His arms are under his head and he's dressed in his favourite red and blue flannel shirt.

"Where have you been?" It's hardly the usual way to welcome back someone into your life. Her happiness has melted away. She's pissed. She's hurt. She's betrayed. He missed her birthday. He left her hanging. He left her vulnerable.

John only smiles. "I love you," he says as he suddenly begins to fade. His voice is carried in the wind. His body soon follows.

Monique opens her eyes and sits up. Half her sweets tumble from her lap to the floor. It's the least of her worries. She looks around. She turns her head left and right. She looks behind her calling his name. It's just a dream. It was only a dream.

Her eyes catch an object shining in the sunlight. She crawls towards it and picks it up. It's a necklace with M engraved on it. It doesn't take her long to realise it's his writing. She reads the note attached to the necklace.

Sorry, I missed your birthday. I love you.

It's then she cries.