Saving Felix (boyxboy)

Chapter Four

"Looks like my father got pissed and left. He doesn't have a house key so if I lock the door he can't get in. But I doubt he'll return." I said more to myself to reassure myself as I lock the door. I turn around and sigh "Don't mind the mess.. it's normally not this destroyed.."

"It's fine. It's better than my house." He looks down and takes a deep breath before starting to cry. I walk over to comfort him.

"Felix, it's okay." I speak softly as I wrap my arms around him.

"It's not okay. I'm tired, tired of everything. I'm in pain!" he looks up at me then away again. "Mentally and physically. I can't deal with this anymore!" he pulls away from me and walk towards the hallway. "Where's the bathroom?"

I stood in silence before replying. "What? Oh um.. Two doors down, on the right."

"Thanks" then he disappears behind the wall, and I hear the bathroom door close. I turn around back to the kitchen and start to pick up broken dishes and trash.

**Felix's P.O.V.**

I shut the bathroom door and lock it. Silence fills my ears as I turn around and look at myself in the mirror. -- My eye is purply and swollen almost shut, my lip is cracked open, and there is a cut on my forehead where my father hit me with a piece of the broken chair he slammed me against. I'm sure I have a broken rib or two.-- I look away with anger and hatred.

I fall to the floor and lean against the wall, wincing in pain. I pull my legs up to my chest, hugging them as I sob into my knees. 'You are a worthless piece of shit. You should have never been born!'

Allen's words run through my head over and over, turning my face beet red as more anger takes over my body.

I look up at the ceiling trying to calm down, but with no success. Dark black dots start to line my vision as I start to feel numb. I try to snap back into reality before it was to late but nothing was working. Before I knew it I lost control and was reaching into my pocket for my only friend. The only one who cares. The one who lets me control my anger and pain. My blade.

The medal feels cold but welcoming in my hand. I pull up my sleeve and place the blade against my inner wrist. I hesitate a few times, but it doesn't stop me. One cut, two cuts, three cuts, four. Blood and tears fall to the floor. I cut a few more then suddenly there is a knock at the door. I look up with tears clouding my eyes, my throat has a lump so I can't call out.

The pounding get louder as Max calls my name, he sounds worried. I look down at my wrist as my blood draws lines down my skin and onto the floor. This time it no longer feels satisfying but cold, pathetic, dirty and selfish. I'm feeling guilt. 'How could I be so selfish! This isn't helping me! Max help! I'm hurt, lost, cold...' my silent screams mentally drains me as I fade slowly out of consciousness.

**Max's P.O.V.**

I start to worry when Felix didn't come back out of the bathroom after 10 minutes. I walk over to the bathroom and start knocking on the door. I get no response so I start to panic and pound on the door harder calling his name. I give up pounding and run to the kitchen for the keys to the bathroom. 'I knew there was a reason my mum keep these.' I then remember my past and sigh. 'Right...'

I run back into the bathroom and unlocked the door. Felix was laying unconscious on the floor blood coming from his wrist. I run over to him taking the blade from his hand and throw it behind me. I turn to the sink and grab a wash cloth then damp it. I crouch next to Felix and grab his hand to clean it up and stop the bleeding. His hand is cold, limp, and lifeless in mine. I feel tears welling up in my eyes as my heart starts to experience a new feeling.

I wipe Felix's wrist and apply pressure to stop the bleeding. I look at his face, his eyes move frantically under his eye lids as his whole body shivers. I try to call him back but it wasn't working. I wrap his arm up and cover him with my blanket. I place his head on my legs as I lean up against the wall.

I play with Felix's hair as I wait for him to wake up, minutes pass and nothing happens after a long while I fall into sleep.

***

I wake up to arms wrapping around me and the words thank you whispered into my ear. I open my eyes to see Felix standing up and taking the hem of his shirt and wiping his eyes. "Oh did I wake you?? I'm sorry..." his voice is crackly and weak.

"It's okay. I'm on the bathroom for gods sake, and I was waiting for you to wake up anyways." I said getting up and stretching.

"Oh.. look I'm really sorry for all of this.. I didn't mean for it to happen.. I became weak under the thought and impulsed.. It didn't feel satisfying at all.. I felt guilty and selfish.." Felix eyes started to fill with tears again making him turn and walk away.

"Felix! Wait." I follow after him, stoping him by placing my hand on his shoulder. "It's fine.. I know the pain and guilt. I've been through this. You just need to commit to yourself that you are going to stop and better yourself."

"I do want to stop. But, right now I'm being pathetic. I shouldn't even be here. I just passed out on your floor. That's not okay in any means."

"I know but.." I pause because I don't know what to say. Awkwardness begins to fill the air. "But things happen and in desperate times our minds take over and don't act clearly... Um.. T.V.??"

"Uh sure yea T.V. sounds nice" Felix said looking at the ground.

We sit down on the couch; me on one end and Felix on the other. I scroll until I find something we both find interesting, which is Bad Ink. Time passes slowly as silence weights heavy in the air.

After a while I get up and walk to my room to get a notebook to write in. I grab my black notebook and pencils then head back down the stairs. Felix still stares blankly at the T.V. I'm sure he's more in deep thought than paying attention to what is actually playing. His hand lays over his wrapped wrist as tears build in his eyes. "Hey, Felix. It's okay. I know it's hard. I understand. You don't need to cry about it now. You're safe. I'm here for you."

"I know." Felix chokes out as he brings his hands to his eyes, crying a little harder. I walk over to him and sit down then wrap my arms around him pulling him into a hug.

"Shhh. It's okay let it out. I'm here for you." I whispered softly into his hair. He cried for a while then stopped.

When he was done crying he hugged me tighter. "Thank you, Max. I've never had anyone help and care like you do.. The last person that helped..." he does a really long pause and looks away from me mortified. "got really hurt by my father.. I think you should stop if you don't want to get hurt.."

"I'm not leaving. I promise I'm staying no matter what happens." I smile warmly.

"If you say so.. this isn't the best path to be traveling.. my ex boyfriend found out the hard way.." Felix goes silent again and asks to stop talking about everything. I agree and we go back to watching T.V.

After a episode of Bad Ink I decide to write so I turn to a clean page..

'Today has been very stressful. So much has happened. I can't even comprehend all that has happened. Felix gets mad at me for helping him, which that gets me kicked out and owning the school money for funds. Ugh. My dad is cheating on my mom with a damn teacher that speaks barely any English and is also married. So pathetic.' I mistakenly said 'so pathetic' out loud and caught Felix off guard. "What?"

"Oh sorry. Um. I'm writing down stuff and said it out loud." I nervously laugh.

"Yea? What you writing about?"

"Just my day. I was calling my dad pathetic."

"Oh okay. Haha." Felix sounds on edge and nervous. He looks back to the T.V. and shifts so he's laying down and goes to sleep.

I let him sleep because I'm sure he's exhausted and I continue to write. After a hour of writing I fall asleep also.

♡♥♡♥

《This chapter isn't the greatest, at least to my personal standards. I tried so hard to write this, my writer's block is to the extreme. But I hope you guys still enjoyed.》