Chester Bennington - Unusual Neighbor

Hard confessions

Obviously, as I stood there on the street, the turmoil of rage that I was feeling increased until it could no longer be contained and it just exploded. I turned around and raced through the stairs, climbing three in every step, reaching his apartment door totally out of breath. I was sick of Chester's maddening behavior, apologies and fucking excuses that always end up with him closing his door in my face.

I knocked on the door violently with my knuckles until it hurt and until he was tired of listening to that annoying banging sound.

Once he opened the door, I took a step forward, trying to enter his apartment.

"No," Chester said as he gently forced me out, walking with me to my apartment.

I took my keys out, hands shaking with no control and opened my door, pushing my arm away from his grip.

"You're fucking crazy," I muffled a maddening chuckle, pushing my hair back with my hands. I stood in my living room, staring at him with a heart beating at the speed of light, my brain was hurting from all the emotions I was feeling, and there was a big lump in my throat that made me want to throw up.

Chester closed the door behind him, his back leaning against it with his eyes glued to the floor as if he was ashamed or had no courage to face me.

"I tried to understand you, Chester. I thought you could become a good friend, that I could rely on and that you could rely on me whenever you need me. I tried to show you that you can trust me completely. But you always keep doing these things! I'm tired of it! I --" I was yelling and I could see that Chester was flinching and almost cowering as I pronounced every word - it was an awful thing to do. And I continued talking without a normal voice, less rage in it. "I don't even understand why you acted like this tonight. Was it something I said or did? I want to know so that I won't do it again in the future. I don't want to hurt you like this, Chester."

For the first time, he lifted his head and looked at me. And that's when my walls crashed down - his beautiful brown teary eyes were mirroring his soul: filled with pain, sadness, rage, sorrow... and darkness.

"Why... why d-- do you accept going out with me if you like Peter? Your mother would be proud, he's a rich boy, and you can go back to your old big house." It was hard for him to start speaking, but as confusing as his words were, at least he spoke something.

"Chester, I don't like Peter."

"Bullshit!" He yelled, but then he saw the way I took a step back, he calmed down, almost whispering. "Bullshit... I saw the way you acted. You were jealous of Peter and Nicole. And -- and besides, he's here for you. He came to see you. And you didn't send him away, so that must means something."

"Yes! It means something. It means that he is someone that cares about me, that sees me as a friend, someone that encouraged me to leave that big old house in the first place! And no, I don't like him that way, nor was jealous of them. But Nicole was hurt not long ago, really hurt, by a man as polite and as charming as Peter, and I don't want to see her in deep shit again! And she was drunk. She would have regretted this if anything happened..." I saw his face relaxing as he realized the truth behind my words. I sighed in defeat. "What's all this??? I don't understand why are you reacting this way, Chester. Not at all."

Chester stood quiet, clearly battling and cursing himself for being too hasty. He wasn't able to say anything. He just sighed and let his arms down in defeat, diverting his eyes back to the floor.

"And what if I liked Peter? Huh? I don't have to give you justifications about what I do or what I don't do. You don't tell me anything about your own life. You don't tell me a single thing about your past; You don't even let me inside your own fucking apartment."