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Oh dear Nicholas,
The following day, I was fifteen minutes early to school. I remember going to the library and studying for the English test we had that day. It was easy, but I was afraid that the teacher would ask me to translate a word to French. So yep, here I was at eight am the morning, studying English vocabulary.
With the paper on the wooden table, I raised my head up to list the words again, that's when I saw you. You just got out of the library, with some books in your hands, wearing jeans and a light green t-shirt. I still remember how much of a mess your curly hair was. Your cheeks had an adorable light blush covering them, probably due to the cold.
Straightening up, I composed myself and waved at you. You waved back, and honestly for a second I thought that you would get out of the library. But you didn't, you came towards me and I felt really kind of glad. Back in that time, I was still convincing myself that I didn't like you, you were just a friend.
"Hello!" I greeted you happily playing with my hands.
You stood right in front and smiled, "Salut, Ca va?" Have I ever mentioned how much I loved your French accent? It's so beautiful; I swear I have never heard such a beautiful accent. The way you speak, it's like your tone is perfectly modeled for French. And also the words you say, I just can't really explain it.
"I'm fine, merci. What about you?" I asked you, and you smiled. Again, taking my breath away. You're too pretty, Nicholas, have I ever told you this? No of course not, I haven't. It would be weird if I did.
"I'm good." You know what I noticed back then? That you were playing with your hands too. It made me feel relief because I knew I wasn't the only one who was nervous.
"Yeah." I awkwardly answered. I wanted to tell you a lot of things, like I wanted to tell you about watching Pitch Perfect and The Breakfast Club, also about watching the last episode of Teen wolf, and also about the mean Sports coach who grounded me. I wanted to tell you that I talked to my cousins, uncles and aunts back in Lebanon over the phone. Also that we're going to Paris next week to this Museum about the Human body and- And I couldn't say anything other than yeah. All these thoughts ran through my head, as I looked into your eyes. I ended up snapping away because of the tension between us that was growing more. I lowered my head and looked at the papers that I had in my hands.
"What are you studying?" You asked me, titling your head a bit to see what I was writing.
"English, like vocabulary. We have a test and yeah."
"Oh okay, but those are easy. I mean you're brilliant in English, you don't need this stuff."
"Yeah but the teacher asks us to translate sometimes, and those stuff are a bit too used so I can't really find the words you know. Like for example, line. How can I explain what line means? Like it's a bit too used so the word defines itself, if you get what I mean."
"Oh yeah I get it. You're kind of right. Are you like, always studying?" I know you meant nothing wrong Nicholas, but I felt my heart squeeze when you said that. Do you know why? Because you thought at that moment that I was a nerd. Another loser who buries herself in her studies all the time, who doesn't have friends and spends all her time studying. And there, the memories, the bullies, my old life; everything came back rushing into me. Still looking at you, I gave you a sad smile, and answered casually acting normal; a bit too normal if anything,
"Well in Lebanon, the studies are really hard and the Lebanese system in general is extremely hard; so I'm kind of used to always revising and stuff. But no I'm not studying all the time. I only study before the exam." I lied and you chuckled.
"Well I better get going, I have French or Math. Shit; I don't know what I have." I spoke out loud in realization. "Crap crap crap, alright I better get going to catch up with someone in my class. Bye!" I hurried gathered all of my stuff and ran towards the door.
Before I went, you laughed and said, "Good luck then."
And that's how another day passed...I kept remembering your face.
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