Love Takes Time: A Miefer Love Story

Heartaches

"If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant. If it did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome."

Charlotte Bronte

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Twitter

@mikareyesss: MVP @kieferravena

@kieferravena: @mikareyesss thanks babe... #YourTimeNow

That was all I can tweet pagdating sa dorm dahil di rin siya ma-contact for the 15 mins I've been trying and then I had to go straight to practice. I swore to myself ako naman ang unang tatawag sa kanya later.

I just don't want this day to end without telling him... ewan, something, anything... I'll think about it later. God, this is so hard.

To my surprise though, after practice, I saw his car parked outside our dorm so, di na ako nagatubili and went inside kaagad. I signalled for my teammates to go ahead inside.

"Hey..."

I don't know if Kiefer heard or saw me first but all I know is once I was inside the car, my arms were suddenly full of Kiefer.

With him in my clutches, I was hoping that whatever I can't say, maiparamdam ko by my embrace.

Because I loath saying inane things like "You'll get them next year, it's not your time", blah, blah, blah.

For an athlete, a loss is a loss. And no amount of consolation can erase the fact the you were not able to get to the end.

I, for one am all too familiar with that. And boy, how I hated each and every person trying to console me. They never get it. They'd never understand the feeling of all your hard work not being enough; of all your blood, sweat and tears, going down the drain.

So no amount of you'll get them next year can actually ease the pain.

Kaya sa ngayon, all I can offer him is a hug and a vow that I'll be here tomorrow as I am today and all the days.

I just hope he finds solace in my arms.

Hinihimas ko lang likod niya, hoping he doesn't cry, because as much as it's cathartic for a person to cry, I don't think kakayanin ko to actually see him do.

Hindi naman sa nababawasan ang pagtingin ko sa lalaking umiiyak. But for my guy to cry, I don't think my heart can take it.

I care and love him too damn much; and just knowing he's in pain already kills me.

His pain is my pain. And I ache for him.

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I thank God for Mika now more than ever.

A lot of my friends have texted me kanina pa - sinusubukang pagaanin loob ko.

And syempre pati ako kanina sa dugout after kami sabihan ni coach na bumawi na lang next season, I had to at least tell my teammates, as their captain, that there's always a next year and I will be there with them.

Pero ang sakit kasi Chris and Nico can't say the same thing. I felt like I failed the team as their leader.

True, that a lot of analysts have given the credit to me for saving my team one too many times, pero ang masaklap e kung kailan kailangan nila talaga ako, dun naman ako hindi nakatulong.

No excuses, lights out or not, the end result is the same, we wasted our advantage, we didn't make it to the Finals. We failed.

Apologetic sa text sakin si Mika kanina kasi kailangan na daw niya bumalik sa Taft at may practice pa sila. I understood and said as much to her when I was able to finally call back.