Sela was still slightly shaking as her, Christa, and a few officers from the police station walked into the detective's office. The events of the day were flashing across her vision, repeating over and over again. It didn't help that she could still feel the blood splattered on her clothing, and especially the blood that had dried on her face. Christa took notice of her condition and quickly thanked the police officers for their help before putting her arm around the smaller woman's shoulders and leading her into an empty room.
"Hey, you okay?"
"Y-Yeah. I know I need to get a hold of myself, I-I can't be a real detective if I-"
"You can stop now." Sela immediately shut her mouth, looking up at the taller woman, going stock still at the tone in her voice. Christa was nearing six foot and had the body of an Olympic athlete, so it was no wonder that Sela was still quite intimidated by her. Especially since Sela only reached 5' 4" and, though age had definitely developed her body from the absolute stick it was when it was younger, it wasn't by much. "You did nothing wrong today. You acted according to what the situation called for, and now that the adrenaline has worn off, the severity of what you saw today is hitting you. They try and they try to prepare you for these things, but nothing can prepare you to actually see them."
"Yeah, but-"
"But nothing. So what if you're freaking out a little bit? You didn't let yourself freak out until after the fact. That's the important part. And trust me, it gets easier. Next time you won't get as spooked, and the time after that, even less so. Give yourself time, Sela," Christa finished, putting her hand on Sela's shoulder.
"Okay."
"Now go home. I'll finish the paperwork and get this case closed. You go home, get the blood cleaned off of you, and relax a little bit. We wouldn't want you to be all worked up when you go on your date, now would we?" Christa said with a wink, and Sela smiled. It was the day of her and Tyler's date, and while she had wanted to ask him what they were doing every time she had seen him, she had refrained from doing so. She'd find out that night what he had planned, now wouldn't she? She practically ran to grab her stuff from her desk and clock out, and she would have run home if not for the adrenaline crash that was hitting her. The thoughts of that day's events were slowly fading from her mind, but she wasn't sure if they would stay that way. But for now, she was thinking of nothing but her date with Tyler.
She had to admit, she had wondered if he was going to do it, or if she should do it, but she decided against either one. After all, he was still incredibly wounded from Josh's death, and she had figured that he hadn't any room for dates or romance in his mind. But he had proved her wrong. That, and he had completely caught her off guard when he asked her right after having gone into his studio for the first time since. She thought that was plenty enough progress for one day, but apparently, it wasn't enough for him. But that worked out in her favor, didn't it? She wondered if Josh had cheered the dude on from Heaven.
That thought made her slightly stop in her tracks. She still hadn't quite gotten over the fact that she had actually seen him on the day he died. If she had only known what he was planning to do when he left that animal shelter. But, then again, how was she to know? There were several reasons why someone would no longer be able to take care of their pet. She took comfort in the fact that she had reminded him that he could take the dog- Jim, wasn't it?- to his brother. But, at the same time, she wondered if she had unintentionally made things easier for him. Had she, by giving Josh the peace that Jim would be taken care of by someone he trusted, helped convince Josh to go through with his suicide?
But it wasn't even that thought that worried her. What worried her was that Tyler, while thankful that Jim was in good hands, would eventually start to think the same way that Sela was, and that was the last thing she wanted. Not when he was making such great progress. But maybe if Sela never brought it up, he wouldn't catch that train of thought. No, she would simply keep that particular thought to herself. At least for now. Maybe later, when Tyler was in a better place mentally, she would talk to him about her worry. But definitely not now. After all, while Tyler had never explicitly said it, she had a feeling that he blamed himself for Josh's death. What she most certainly did not need was him switching the blame over to her, and then cutting her out of his life because of that.
YOU ARE READING
Truce {ON HOLD}
Fanfiction{Tyler Joseph} "Stop playing that song." "What?" "I said quit playing that song! Quit playing 'Truce'! I never wanna hear that song again as long as I live!" "Don't you see? I can't. I can't quit playing, because if I do, then I'm letting the demons...