Once In A Lifetime

Chapter 8 - Pirate's Cove Beach

Ethan's car had to be towed back to his house. Declan had Ethan in his backseat and I followed behind in Victor. When we arrived at the house, Ethan was passed out in the back seat, drunk and sad. It was pretty depressing to see, and I couldn't help but feel that I needed to be there for him as a friend.

We pulled up behind the tow truck and watched the guy take down Ethan's car, pulling it into his driveway. I got up, taking Ethan out of the backseat and letting him lean onto my shoulder with my arm around him. "Let's get him inside," Declan said as we walked up to the front door. I yelled out, "Thank you!" to the tow truck driver and waved. He smiled, and drove off. Ethan's hood was still all smashed up, thanks to Letty's anger and the hood's inability to be strong.

Declan carried Ethan into his living room, laying him down on the couch. He put a blanket over him, "Alright, bud, you rest here, okay? Your car is safe in your driveway, we're gonna head out now." Ethan looked over at me, his eyes were very drowsy and the look on his face broke my heart. It made me feel bad for tearing up his note and throwing it as if it meant nothing. But it wasn't my fault that I felt emotionally scared of him, he had broken my heart and most importantly, my trust. I'm terrified to fall in love again, but I want to so badly. Just not with him, because I know what will happen in the end. I'll be left alone. Again.

"Darcy... can I talk to you for a moment, please?" Ethan asked as he continued looking at me. I looked over at Declan, "I'll meet you outside." He nodded, and walked out. I could hear him start up his car. I looked back over at Ethan, putting my hands in my pockets and waiting for him to say something. "Come here..." he responded, reaching out his hand. I frowned and shook my head, "Ethan, I have to get going, what is it?" Putting his hand back under the blanket, he sighed to himself, and looked in another direction, "Fine. Just go, I'll get Aubrey to come over." That right there, seemed to crush me all over again. I stormed out of the house and over to Victor, quickly getting in the driver's seat and started up the engine. I rolled my window down and placed a cigarette into my mouth, lighting it and speeding out of the driveway.

I didn't look back, I just continued driving. For hours many thoughts were running through my head as I passed several spots that contained so many memories with Ethan. We grew up together, fell in love, fell out of love, then back in, and then it was all gone within a matter of seconds. It's sad that I wanted all of that back. I wanted the great parts, which I couldn't seem to let go of. Everything was falling apart and I didn't know how to cope with it. The only thing that seemed to make me truly happy anymore was my car, and driving. Other than that, everything else just appeared blank. What the fuck was wrong with me?

Pulling up onto a high cliff, I stopped my car at the top and got out. I lit another cigarette and took a long drag, wanting to inhale all of the bad things to make myself know I can not continue loving Ethan. Unfortunately, it's not that simple. I put on my black leather jacket and sat on the hood of my car, keeping my feet on the edge of the cliff. I began crying silently and letting the ocean breeze take my pain away. I didn't want to die, I just wanted the pain to be gone. I wanted to be fearless, and not soft. I looked over as the sun was setting over the water, my cigarette was almost down to the end of itself as I took one last drag. I put the burnt out cigarette in my pocket, then laid my hands on my lap. Right then, I decided I was going to start keeping to myself. I would of course still keep in contact with my friends, but Declan... that's going to have to change. From the looks of him and his personality, I knew I was going to end up falling in love with him if I continued showing him around my hometown and riding with him in his car. Love is dangerous for me, so I began to take control of my emotions and stop myself from caring about someone else in that way.

I could hear the waves hitting the rocks at the bottom of the cliff, but there was a sound coming from behind me that seemed to block out that noise. I looked over my shoulder, and saw my brother's purple Subaru pull up beside Victor. I looked away, knowing he was going to be upset that I have ignored his calls while being on the edge of the largest cliff in Malibu. "Darcy! What are you doing?" he yelled out. I shook my head and closed my eyes, keeping my head down and crossing my arms. I felt his hand touch my shoulder and gently pulling me away from my car and into his arms. He hugged me tight as his voice slightly cracked, "You better not be trying to off yourself again. Do you hear me?" I nodded as I hugged him back, resting my head against his chest.

"Sid, I wasn't trying to do that. I was just coming out here to clear my head. I'm sorry I scared you, it's just... Been a very long day," I said as I looked up at him.

For the next hour, we sat on the hoods of our cars and talked about how our days went. Turns out, we both were pretty upset. I couldn't stand it when I would let my own pain cover someone else's to where I couldn't see theirs. And that's exactly what I did when I ignored Sid's calls. I thought he was just trying to figure out where I was, but he needed me. Jules broke up with him that day, after breaking the news that she had cheated on him multiple times with a guy that had broken her heart before. His name was Will, and he was known for dealing drugs in high school and smoking heroin. When he and Jules dated back then, he would force her sexually and then beat her senseless afterwards. She stayed with him because of all of the money he had, and she was afraid that what she wanted to do with her future wouldn't work out.

"Brother... I am so sorry, I didn't know any of this was going on. We were just with Jules this morning and everything seemed fine," I said to Sid as I frowned. His eyes were filled with tears, but not once did one fall down his face. At the time I think he was trying to stay strong for me, for the both of us. "Darcy, Jules and I have been fighting for weeks over the pettiest things. I didn't understand why. After we left the house this morning she immediately started an argument. It was about the temperature of the inside of my car, so I adjusted it to her liking but she still didn't seem happy. I offered to take her out to eat but she insisted I just drop her off at home. When we got there, she confessed to cheating on me with Will and that's she's been trying to get me to break up with her for weeks so she didn't have to feel guilty about cheating on me or me even finding out about it," he replied as his voice choked, "I saved her from Will years ago. I got him off of her, keeping him from practically killing her in her house. And now she forgives him? After everything he put her through along with forcing her to take drugs and perform sexual acts? It makes me sick to my fucking stomach. I can't do anything but wait and see if he physically tries to hurt her again then I can report him to the cops."

My heart ached for him, and I sympathized with how he felt. We had both been cheated on now by two people we've cared about for years. But his pain was way greater than mine, and I wanted to take that away. Sid didn't deserve to be hurt that way, ever, all he did was help people. Especially Jules. This made me pretty much hate her, and it's hard for me to hate someone. But once you hurt my friends, family, or my car, you can no longer have me in your life.

Sid stood up and put his hands in his pockets, "Come on... Let's go home. I'm sure mom and dad are worried," he looked over at me, "And Darcy, you don't have to keep talking to Declan. I understand why you don't want to. But at least let him know you're okay. He's the one that called me to come find you when I texted him after what happened with Jules when I couldn't get ahold of you. He's a good guy." I nodded, lighting another cigarette and getting into my car. I started the ignition and plugged my phone into the aux, dialing Declan's number as I followed behind Sid heading home. It was past midnight so when Declan answered, "Hello?" his voice sounded very sleepy. It made me kind of smile, his voice was deep and a bit raspy from waking up.

"Hey, I just wanted to let you know I'm alright and I'm sorry for leaving Ethan's so quick today. I couldn't stay there a minute longer. I'm heading home now with Sid," I said as I rolled down my window to let the cigarette smoke out. "It's okay," he responded, "I understand. He did seem pretty out of it. I hope he didn't say anything to upset you."

I sighed softly as I came to a stop light, "Declan... I am very glad we met. I wish it would have been in a different way rather than you being Ethan's friend, I know that sounds bad so I apologize. But... we can't be friends." The light turned green and I caught up with Sid. "Darcy. We can be friends. We don't have to let Ethan get in the way of that, I know you don't want him to," he said. I could hear him moving in his bed, the sheets were ruffling and it sounded like he turned his light on. "No, we can't. I'm sorry. Take care of yourself," I said, then quickly hung up. It felt like my heart was breaking all over again. I did not want to do that whatsoever but it was the best choice, for my sake. And I knew that was selfish but I couldn't risk falling in love again with someone.

I pulled up my Spotify and turned the volume up, blasting one of my favorite classic rock albums by Bon Jovi. "Keep The Faith" was on repeat as I continued the ride home. We passed by Ethan's house, since it was only a few minutes down the road from ours. I couldn't help but look over, and there they were. Aubrey and Ethan standing outside next to his car. It looked like they were arguing, and Aubrey stormed off into the backyard while Ethan followed her. Before, I would have pulled in and followed them. But that wasn't my concern anymore and I just wanted to go home to mom and dad. Nothing is more important than family.