EVERYTHING IS FINE ( oneshot book. )

grief - rhyvin

a/n: tessa's posting already :0? nah it's a repost of smth i wrote a while back- but still!! it's angst time babey!!

rhys grins up at the taller boy, breath catching. there's something so ethereal about kevin, something as surreal as golden skies and silver suns, as emerald rain and sapphire snow. leaning up to press a quick kiss to his lips, he tugs at the lopsided scarf kev's never taken off. the one rhys made for him. heart still skipping that highschool-crushesque beat, he squeezes their interlocked hands, turning away. "you ready to go? i'll get the cheque." under the table he fiddles with a small leather box, visualising the way the diamond would look set off against kevin's creamy skin.

 "yeah!" kevin replies, his trademark smile dimpling at rhys. "you don't have to pay, though, sweethe-" he's distracted by the ring of his phone. rhys silently curses himself for not asking him to silence his phone before they arrived at this swanky restaurant. meanwhile, kevin's smile's dropped and the faintest shadow of a frown is blemishing his face. "what? what- no, george, we were going to begin the overthrow tom-" he cuts himself off. sighing resignedly, he turns to his disapproving boyfriend. "rhys, honey-" "it's fine. you go do your thing." rhys can't stay mad at him. he kisses him softly. "stay safe, okay?" 

he never did propose to kevin.

he never married him, in a white tux and a wide grin.

they never grew old together, skin sagging and hair whitening with age but still... so beautiful. so ethereal.

rhys stares down at the ring in his hand. his hand forms a fist, the other screwed up against his tearstained eyes."I THOUGHT YOU'D COME BACK TO ME!" he yells at the sky, sand stinging him and wind whipping at his hair. not thinking anything except a mindless rage, he throws the ring as far as he can. but of course it's futile. he's never been mad at kevin, why would he? kevin never did a thing wrong. but oh god, he's indescribeably furious. he's furious at the world, at life, at strexcorp. 

sinking to his knees with a hysterical urgency, he digs at the sand, attempting to find his prized possession: the engagement ring he never proposed with. he's crying, screaming, yelling. because what else do you do?

what else do you do when you're all alone in the world? what do you do when you have to watch your true love have his soul pulled apart then sewn back together like some gruesome frankenstein? when YOU'RE one of the ways they torture him? when you watch him lose his mind? when, one day, you come home and realise that your kevin no longer exists? when your kevin becomes some mechanical slave who barely knows your name?

where do you run? where do you hide?

rhys gives up, lying back on the sand with his body convulsing with unchecked sobs and his heart in shreds. he'd kill hinself if he could move from this deadly, shuddering pain rearing its head throughout his body.

what do you do when you've got nothing left?

kevin was his everything.

and now he's gone.

well, no, he's not, which makes it all the more torturous. if he wanted to he could tune into the radio right now and hear his soft, lilting voice. but it wouldn't be him. rhys's kevin is gone. strexcorp's kevin is not.

rhys's kevin is gone.

and that's all he had left.

a/n: i love rhys SM duderinos- sorry you get the shit half of the tessree duo first :0