In the stars

Exasperated

Very annoyed

"What are you doing now?"

I sign and sent my little sister a deadly look, but for as long as I can remember, she has been immune from my starters.

"I am cooking dinner, now sit at the table and do your homework, I am busy." I take a fork and fish out a pasta to see if it is ready. it isn't. Annabel sits at the table, but she doesn't take out her books. I turn around and stare her in the eyes again.

"Homework."

"Where is dad?"

My mouth turns into a straight line and I shift to the table again. I don't know where dad is, and she knows, that I don't know. I hear stuff being moved around, something falls on the floor, I almost burn myself on the pan.

"What are you doing!" I face her and stop. She is holden a piece of paper close into her body, and I feel all of my anger melt away.

"I made something for you Milly."

"Ohh"

Slowly, she stretches out her arm and shows me what she has drawn. it is me and her, in front of our house. We are both smiling and holding each other. Even the flowers are smiling. There is no mom and dad. No adults. Only us and we are happy.

She looks at my face as if she is trying to see if I well get mad again. But I won't. I can feel the tears behind my eyes. Tears that I will never cry. I pull her into my arms.

"It is beautiful Annabel, you are good at this, come we will hang it here on the refrigerator."

The sentence feels so normal, and the light in her eyes make her look so beautiful.

"Do you really think it is good?" She is hoping on the spot and clapping her hands together.

I laugh "yes I do, now let's eat. The pasta shout be ready now."

----

I am used to sleeping with one eye open, so to speak, so when someone started banging on the front door, I was the first up. Annabel came out of her room, with the small teddy bear prest into her chest.

"Milly for fuck sake, open the damn door, NOW!"

It is dad. I push Annabel back in her room and tell her to lock the door. I hear the click and to open up, hoping the neighbors didn't hear anything.

"Dad what are you doing?"

He stumbles into the house and stops in front of me.

"Milly, my beautiful women, come give your daddy a kiss."

he put out his arms, but I start backing away.

"You smell bad, go take a shower, I don't want Annabel to see you like this."

He sniffs and keeps coming closer "Don't you love your daddy?"

He is too far away to talk sense into. He is too far away to talk to. I duck under his arm and slams the door behind me.

"MILLY!"

I knock on Annabel's door and she opens right away like she has been waiting for me. I take her up and luck after me. I can hear how he has figured out to open the hallway dor, and how he is tramping down to us. I lay Annabel in bed and squish in beside her.

"It is okay Annabel, just relax, try and get some sleep you need to go to school tomorrow, he will calm down, just sleep."

He is banging on the door, and I pray to a God, that doesn't exist, that it will hold. That he will give up, sleep it out. I pull Annabel closer and fell her tears on my shirt.