the art of

eleven » check the box if

Alice and Alex stared at the baby lying limp on the kitchen island.

"So...what d-do we do wi-with it?" Alex nudged it with his finger.

"First, let's stop by calling it an 'it'," Alice raised an eyebrow with a sly smile on her face. "Second, being the amazing person I am, I got us the hookup."

"The w-what?" Alex's eyebrows furrowed. "L-Like d-drugs? I'm s-sorry, Al-lice. I don't k-know what y-you're into b-but I do-don't like to d-do drugs. It's n-not good for m-my lu-lungs. A-And to b-be com-pletely h-honest, as a f-friend of yours, I-I think you s-sh-shouldn't do drugs e-either."

Alex noticed how Alice was holding back the laughter, just barely suppressing it with her lips.

"Y-You don't mean drugs, n-nevermind." He smacked his face with his palm, embarrassed of his little speech.

"No, not drugs. Instead of drug dealing, I deal good grades." Alice smirked and pulled out a checklist of how to get an A on the project. "Here, ladies and gentlemen, we--"

"Alice, it-it's just me." Alex sarcastically chuckled.

With a straight face, Alice continued, "as I was saying, here we have the list on how to ace this project of taking care of our spawns.

Step one. Make sure the baby is fed a minimum of 3x a day for the system to register.

Step two. Make sure the baby is burped the same amount as fed in a day, 1 minute after feeding.

Step three. Make sure the baby has a clean diaper, the trick is to wait 15 to 30 minutes post-feeding.

Step four. Make sure the baby gets multiple nap times, a minimum of 3x times.

Step five. M--"

"How ex-exactly did you get this l-list?"

"Oh, well..you see... I messaged a classmate who already took the class, and got their grading rubric that the teacher said not to release to anyone."

"And h-how did you get them t-to agree t-to send it?"
"Oh Alex, you have a lot to learn, young one," Alice placed a hand on Alex's shoulder, to which Alex rolled his eyes as a response. "It's known, this beautiful thing, as....blackmail." Alice moved her hand from left to right in the air, as if the word appeared above them.

"Y-You didn't," Alex gasped.

"Oh, but I did. Yes, I did." Alice spun around the island, "I have so much to teach you."

"But w-when we get an A, w-what w-will we tell the t-teacher when t-they ask u-us how we did s-so well?"

"That we're amazing parents, duh."

"It w-would b-be great to h-have a list f-for our r-regular l-lives." Alex's eyes glistened with sadness as he recalled the series of events that took place this week.

"I thought so too, but then I realized that we create lists for absolutely everything. Groceries, for what to take with us to college, classes to take to finish our degrees, how to get into our careers, what we need for setting up a wedding, path to buying a house, packing list for vacation, and the places we need to see, the names for our future children, crossing them out, and writing new ones to only cross those out in hopes of not embarrassing them in the future... in other words, we have this mindset that if we complete task A, then we can get to task B, and if we finish task B, we can start on task C, and the closer we are to task C, it means that task D is waiting to be checked off, and so on. The cycle burrows itself into our everyday lives. We don't realize we're making a list for our own lives, with the very end of it being 'death' and then we can check that off too. I'm not saying that making lists are bad, hell I even love them. They keep me focused and organized. But if it's not on the list, does that mean we cannot enjoy that one spontaneous adventure? Does that mean that if I don't complete that certain task my entire life career will fall down a rabbit hole? We constantly scrutinize ourselves for not having fulfillment in our lives. Yet that fulfillment comes when our expectations are not set in stone. If we expect that by this year, we should have x, y, and z done, and if we don't complete them, we will feel so depressed. This in return tumbles into a mindset of oh if I can't get x, y, and z done, then how will I get anything done and be happy?" Picking up the baby robot, Alice tilted her head and stared at it, pondering before carefully choosing the words she'd speak into existence.

"It would be insane to not feed, burp, change the diaper, and rock the baby to sleep, but it would be ridiculous to think you are a horrible parent if you are not awake 24/7 365 days a year. Or else you'll never feel at peace when you take your last breath, as morbid as that sounds." She handed the baby over to me.

"Just know that you're doing absolutely brilliant at whatever it is you are doing. I know that the people around you might not showcase that to you, but if you ever need reassurance that the list you are dancing on, you meet all of its qualities and it's all checked off." Alice gave me a true smile, one filled with stars, and I could see my reflection in them.

"T-thank you, Alice."