MY NIGHTMARE MY SAVIOR//LUKE HEMMINGS

Chapter 1 ♡

Knocking.That was all I heard,really loud knocking caused me to open my eyes I let out a groan wondering why my body hurt so much and I saw that I fell asleep sitting on my bathroom floor and the memories of last night came rushing back.

My mother was in one of her moods last night because of my stupid step dad so she decided to lash out on me and call me horrible names.She didn't hit me though.At least not this time anyway but her words stung,she called me a shitload of names last night and that was the reason for my hasty retreat to my room.

I searched for me razor and finally found it and I locked myself in my bathroom, I sat on the floor and began making both horizontal and vertical cuts on both my arms,occasionally muttering swear words because my salty tears kept falling on my open cuts.

After my artwork was finished I admired both my arms and smiled a little, I felt better but then everything that has ever gone wrong in my life came flooding back all at once and it was just too much for me so I broke down let my tears out.

I guess I must've fallen asleep that explains why I feel like shit.

The banging on my door kept getting louder and I groaned and stood up before walking out of my bathroom and to my room door.

"what" I snapped at the person banging rudely at me door

"honey you should get ready for school"

oh it was just my mother, I rolled my eyes and scoffed typical mom last night she basically told me I should  kill myself and this morning she's acting all motherly and shit, it's become a ritual so I guess I adapted to it.

I made sure my room door was properly locked before slipping my clothes off and going into the shower, I forgot about my cuts temporarily so the feeling of the water on my open cuts shocked me a little, after my shower I put on a pair of black skinny jeans my black ankle boots my misfits shirt and about 15 handbands on each hand, I use them to hide my cuts but I also really like bands I collect them.

I made my way downstairs and out the house without even glancing at my mother,I hoped in my car and drove to school, you see my aunt and uncles and my dad usually send me money and I always babysit so I always have money to buy myself things and save for college because I know my mom couldn't care less about anything related to me, I bought myself a car I bought myself a phone I pay my tuition, I buy my own food I never eat anything she cooks,EVER.

Anyway I let my thoughts consume Me and didn't realise I had already gotten to school.i park my car and run run a had though my hair before sighing, I looked up at the place where everyone assumes I'm the PERFECT RICH girl with no problems, the place where everyone expects me to put on a smile all day every day, the place where I'm expected to be anything BUT myself, I felt my phone vibrate beside me

Hey I see you,you don't look so good, mom issues?, you shouldve called me I'm always there for you, don't think about skipping today, I have good news for you xxxx Lex

I smiled at the text and look up to see a purple haired girl grinning at me, my bestfriend Alex is the only one that knows about all the shit that has happened to me, she's the only one that knows the real me

I'm Jordan by the way i live and was born and raised in sydeny Australia,I moved from Sydney when i was fifteen and stayed with my aunt in london for a year because my therapist thought it was a good idea,after after u ear in London i moved back and started a new school which was in Sydney but it was different from my other one, I became friends with lex and she said Jordan makes her think of sneakers so she started calling me Jay which I don't mind and I guess it kinda caught on, now everybody calls me Jay.

I'm 17 I have multicoloured hair and blue eyes,i'm originally a blonde and i wear contacts, they make my eyes purple, i have alot of issues.But the one thing that keeps me from snapping is Music, and lex, her real name is alexandria but when I came people just called her alexa or Lexi but then I started calling her lex and it stuck.

I realised I had zoned out again when I saw lex hitting my window and I opened the door

"you don't have to break my window you know" I told her as she hugged me tight

"I know but you zoned out again" I heard her behind me as we began walking to my locker

"yeah I'm sorry about that i just have a lot of things on my mind" I said sincerely

"you shouldve called me I would've come to get  you" she said looking at my hands trying to see the new cuts

"lex I don't wanna talk about this so stop" I snap before retrieving my music book from my locker.

I looked around and saw all the prom queen posters you see it was the final days of senior year, prom was in two weeks and graduation in two weeks and 2 days.

we walked to music class and the walk there was silent, we sat in our seats before I spoke up "you said you have news though" and she gave her million dollar smile

"yes" she whisper yelled and passed me a piece of paper that looked like a ticket,

I read it and saw that it was a ticket to a 5 seconds of summer concert, I tried my best not to scream and I looked at my best friend who has this huge grin on her face I mouthed and I love you so much to her before doing a happy dance in my seat, I love 5 seconds of summer so much I have never seen them before though but their music helps me cope, I don't know their names or what they look like, actually I barely know famous people I just listen to music all day but don't know the people who sing the songs because I believe that you don't need to know what a person looks like or know their name to enjoy their music, I rarely watch TV, I have no social networks because the only person I actually really talk to is lex and we just text all day, other people that claim to be my friends never ask for my number so I don't interact with them except during school. I couldn't believe I was meeting 5SOS the next night.

The day went by really quickly which I was grateful for,I was spending the night at lex's because it was a Friday and we had a concert to go to the next day, I drove home and an unusual black van at Mrs hemmings house but I shrugged it off.

Mrs hemmings is my neighbour and she's also the mother of the boy who singlehandedly ruined my life, the boy who broke me and made me this suicidal girl who cuts for relief, I pushed the thoughts away and ran into my room before packing the essentials.

I was walking back to my car when I spotted four boys, three of them I recognised as luke, Michael and calum but the last one I didn't know, honestly I hoped they were all dead because three of them made my life a living hell, the stranger with brown hair spotted me and said something something to them and they began smiling and walking towards me but I just walked faster to my car and drove off.

You see Luke,Michael and calum used to be in my old school they were kind of popular and I was the loner girl,I was shocked when luke invited me to a party because I never got invited to anything especially not by the hot popular guy so being the naive little girl I was back then I said yes and I got the prettiest thing in my closet and I wore it to the party,I was only 15, I was so stupid, at the party luke gave me alcohol and promised i won't get drunk but he just kept giving me more and more and next thing I new we had sex, I had sex with luke at the age of 15, I lost my virginity,he didn't say a word to me he just got dressed and took out a hidden camera before leaving me in the room, he filmed everything and showed it to Michael and calum, it was all just a stupid bet and he won, I was so naive, he used me and everyone found out and called me names, I was called a slut I was called a whore I was called a lot of things and luke and his friends just watched and laugh the whole time, I was being bullied continuously until I had enough, I tried to kill myself but I was caught and sent for therapy, I was taken to my aunts house in hopes that being away from the bullying would make me stop but it didn't because words cut too deep, when I got back I started my life again I'm no longer that naive and pathetic fifteen year old.i wiped a tear from my face and got of my car before walking into lex's house