8. Jennifer
I know what you did... I can hear nothing but these 5 words screaming inside my head. Can see nothing but this fucking text displaying on my screen, brighter than it should. Feel nothing but my shaking hands which James is...
I look at him. He's holding my hands, trying to calm me down. His lips move. He's talking to me, I guess since a longer while. But I just... I can't hear.
Somebody knows. That's all I can think about at the moment. But knows... What? That we were on the roof that night? Even if anyone saw us, must have also seen that we didn't do anything bad. (Okay, except smoking weed). Might have also seen the fight, but it doesn't matter the same, because eventually Charlie fell alone... Right? I really wish I remembered that night better. I don't think James could lie to me, I mean, why he should? But at the end of the day it's better to have your own memories. And I don't have. Any. Maybe just some flashbacks. For example I remember him telling me that I'm special. I also reminded myself a part of their fight and me desperately begging James to stop. But that's exactly what he told me. In my head I just see it all blurred. My eyes don't even know where to look at. Walls... The floor... My phone on the floor...
- Jen... Jennifer! - he grabs my face and holds it in his hands, making me look in his eyes since I didn't react for the hands holding.
He's staring deeply into my eyes, trying to get what's inside my head, I guess. But believe me, boy, you are not ready to see that mess.
- I'm... I'm fine, James. Just... - just what, Jennifer?
I can't fall apart, not now. I never let people see this weak, ugly side of myself. I don't let anyone in, especially not someone who I barely know. And he's already seen how weak I can be, that's enough. I don't even know why I feel so vulnerable next to him. This is just so crazy. But at the end of the day... He makes me feel good. And safe. And honestly, that's all I need at this moment.
- You are f i n e? Say it once again and I swear to God, I'll slap this beautiful face of yours.
- You know, I would even like that - I whisper, finally looking into his eyes.
I didn't expect myself to say that, but sometimes words slip from my mouth without warning my brain about possible consequences of what I say. James looks a bit surprised too. Well, can I blame him? We are stuck in this whole situation without any idea how to move on. NYPD is on our back, that anonymous dick knows something too. I hate being scared, being afraid of the future. I've always lived the moment, enjoyed every second God gave me. And if anyone is planning to make us look guilty, if these are my last moments of freedom, then...
I let him dry the rest of tears I let out. You met the weak, defenceless Jennifer, but have you seen the fighter, a woman who always gets what she wants? A woman who goes for it? One of my exes used to sing: whatever Lola wants, Lola gets. And what Lola wants now is...
I put my hands around his neck, caring it with my nails. He got what I want, the excitement is written all over him. But before our lips can meet, before the desire can be fulfilled, I just want to...
- Kiss me like the world is gonna disappear - I whisper, with my lips touching his ones, waiting him to do it.
And he does. He does it perfectly. Our lips sink in that passionate kiss. His hands - which were caring my cheeks, now slides down my back. His touch changes into a harder one. My heart races as I feel the passion he holds me with.
- Kiss me like you mean it - he says, taking a little distance but still moving hands hard down my waist.
I know he loves games, and so do I. The only problem here is that... I don't know if I want this to be a game. Unless...
- Wanna play a game? - I whisper on his lips. - Just know that... - I bite his bottom lip with a little smile of an asshole - You are the player.
Now that he knows how things are, I hope I woke up his wildest side. Because that's what I want. My hands get rid of his belt, then his jeans. He tears (wow, okay) my clothes, leaving only my white lingerie on. The way we kiss steals the breath from my lungs. His hand is running up my body again, he stops it on my neck. Then beats my head on the wall as he's holding my neck, pushing it and stealing my air. Call me crazy but... I love that.
He must have seen my happy face as he goes down, leaving hard kisses all over my cleavage and boobs. I impulsively pull him more, his face is right in from of my pussy. He licks me through panties and then grabs them in his teeth and rips off. Oh my...
His tongue takes me to the heaven, but do we have time for preliminaries? No. I want him. Inside. Now.
I grab his head and let him enjoy the taste for a while more. He keeps licking my abs and the space between my boobs as I pull him up. I loved having his tongue going crazy down there, but for now...
- Fuck me, James. Fuck the hell out of me - I whisper while moaning on his ear.
He grabs me as I jump on him, my legs get tangled around his hips. I go rubbing my pussy on his dick. Damn, I don't remember when was the last time I was so fucking excited. The way he holds me, looks at me... The craziness in his damn eyes. I...
James kisses my neck all the way to the bedroom and then pushes me hard on bed. Someone's playing the boss, huh? This is exactly what I need right now. A man who knows how to keep me turned on.
I put my hands on his back as he goes above me, but before I can scratch it, he grabs my hands and beats them on a pillow above my hand. Okay, Mr. Nava, we will play by your rules. Now I regret not having handcuffs somewhere near to bed, but how could I know I would need them? And well, he's doing pretty good even without them.
I could keep my legs closed and play more with him. Well, he doesn't have other 2 hands to spread them since his hands are busy holding my ones. And what now, James?
- Jennifer. Your legs. - he says.
- Mm... My legs? - I can't help a smile. It's you who wanted to play, my dear.
- Open them. - I love that mad serious voice. Ahh...
- Or?
Or he will grab your both hands with his one and put the other hand on your neck, Jennifer.
- That's all you can do? - I whisper slowly while smiling, well, it's not easy to breathe while being choked. But I'm fucking enjoying it.
It's so beautiful to watch the craziness in his eyes changing into madness. He leaves my hands and neck and with one hard move opens my legs so damn wide, putting them around his hips. Before I can move my hands, he's already holding them back, also my neck is being choked again. How even...? Okay, you won, James. You have me now. You see me now. All wet for you. All yours. Only. Mmm... Yours.
- I'm gonna drive you crazy - he whispers on my ear with such excitement in his voice. I let a little moan slip out from my mouth.
I know he wanted to tease me more, to play more. He wanted me to ask him, to beg him to finally enter and let me feel him. But his desire won with him. He couldn't help anymore, he couldn't wait. So I had him sliding that fucking monster into me, so damn deep and hard. Mmm...
My moans get louder as he's beating my pussy up, going faster and harder with every move he does. I feel his heavy breath on my neck which he's still holding. I don't even know how the hell I'm still alive. My hips go against him, but he suddenly grabs them, not letting me move. His hand starts shaking on my clit and I'm... Holy shit! My whole body is bending, moans transform into scream. My hands (which he had to leave to grab my legs) scratch his back so hard that I feel his skin under my nails. My pussy is shaking as his hand and dick go more, I pull him closer from neck and kiss him. He doesn't slow down even for a second. I feel myself getting so damn wet. I can see that James can't hold himself anymore too. He kisses me back so hard that I can taste blood. And then I feel his sperm, exploding inside me. Oh my... Did I just... Squirt?
He keeps shaking that damn hand and doesn't stop until he's empty. My juices fly all over his chest. I hear myself screaming. When we are done coming, he slaps my little girl couple times and then falls with head on my boobs. Oh shit, I've never felt so damn empty and full at the same time.
James breathes heavily for a longer while and then takes his head up to look at me. He smiles as he sees me so satisfied and relaxed. He knows he's amazing and I'm glad he can read that from my face.
- Game over? - I pull his hair and play with them.
- The game's just started, babygirl. - he says while caring my smile with his finger.
Okay, that was... cute. He called me babygirl! Damn, I should start to control my heartbeat. I don't want him to think he already has me, pfff! I fix his head on my boobs, his new pillow. We cuddle each other so tight and he falls asleep in less than a second. Seeing how tired he got makes me even more satisfied.
I'm about to sleep too when my phone starts vibrating on the floor where I left it. God, really? Can't it wait?
I get up slowly, I don't want to wake James up. After all he did to me he deserves to take some rest. And believe me, he will need lots of energy, because I really like this guy. Even if we weren't anything more, I would be totally fine playing this our little game.
Oh damn, now that I got up I actually feel how he broke me. I can barely walk, my whole body hurts. I see some bruises on my legs. My pussy is still pulsing. Not telling how red she is. No, hold on. How red I am. My neck, my boobs...
I find my phone on the floor. The screen says I got a message from...
I drop it faster than I took it. It's not a text, it's a photo. A photo taken the night we were on the roof. A photo that shows terrified Charlie on the edge. A photo that shows James's back and his hand on dead boy's chest... What...?!
I... Where are my clothes? I look around. Fuck, he tore them all. I grab a t-shirt of him and wear it carelessly.
My eyes find a mirror on the wall. My whole body has proofs of his touch. My neck... My wrists... Hickeys... Redness...
I need to get out of here, I need to...
I grab my phone and walk to door. James's sleeping with that fucking angelic face, like nothing would ever happen. I can't stay here. I can't... It doesn't make any sense.
I manage to find the door and go out. I have to hug the wall as I walk down a hallway. The pain gets stronger but I can't stop now. I don't even want to think what could happen if he woke up now and saw me running away... Would he hurt me? God, we just had sex, full of feelings and passion, but maybe I was wrong about him. Maybe I shouldn't have felt safe with him. What do I actually know about this guy?
It feels like road through hell, but I finally reach my room. All I know is that I can't feel safe even here, but I don't have any other place to go. All I can do now is closing door with the key and waiting for what's coming... Some voice inside my head tells me that I can't expect anything good to happen.
