part 1 the feasting

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you blush. it had been years since you'd seen... him. his green scales, red lips, weirdly british accent... it made him so attractive.

it had been a shock when geico lizard-kun-sama-tan had texted you after all those years, randomly sending you a one liner and then asking you on a date... back then you'd been close, but geico lizard had started acting... strange. it had created a rift between you two. but now, it seemed the rift had never been there, and was in fact an exaggerated hole in the ground.

you look up at the diner-- mindy's dive bar.

you feel a tinge of red pierce your cheeks.... you had told geico lizard back in high school this place held a spot in your heart. as if on cue, you felt hands on your shoulders... slimy hands. you jumped, twirling around in your hot pink mini skirt. geico lizard smiled at you warmly.

your face was as red as the rose he was offering you. "y/n-chan..." he breathed in a sultry voice. "i've missed you so much."

"i... well, i missed you t-too, geico lizard-senpai-sama! sugoii! nya!" your tail was wagging and your ears perked up. with a skip in your step, you took geico-lizard-senpai-tan's scaley naked arm and walked inside. immediately, the barkeeper looked at us.

"ah, you're a couple, eh? we're 'avin' a special for couples!" the barkeep cheered. she had a southern drawl and a cowboy hat. a lasso was strung up on the cash register-- it could be assumed it was hers. her flannel shirt was worn from age.

i blushed, looking to geico lizard for advice. to my shock, he said "oh, really? that's so great, because we're a couple..." as he said that, his hand glided down my back. it was a little low for the first date ever, and we hadn't seen each other for years. it was a little weird... but when i looked into geico lizard-senpai's eyes, they were self assured, strong. i decided to play along. i stuttered as i spoke.

"w-w... what's the special we'll get?" i subconsciously pressed a little closer against geico-lizard-sama. i saw a tinge of pink hit his cheeks as i did so. it was fun to see geico-lizard-senpai get flustered over me instead of the other way around. i was happy i had chosen my smallest dress suddenly. a red one aswell.

as we sat at the bar, geico lizard sama took a jug of water. he deadass just poured it on his shirt. "oh, whoops," he shrugged. he acted like he had not just been a man whore. "well, i guess i don't have any extra shirts. and i don't want to wear this wet one. so..."

he literaly just took it off like right there in the bar deadass. i was there. i saw it. i was the barstool seat.

i FURIOUSLY BLUSHED. i was crimson red. geico lizard was fucking ripped. probably because he saved 15% on all of the equipment he used to train himself. he looked at me. "yeah, i'm not that wimpy little kid from high school. i decided i would run the entire geico company one day. i got weight training. i ran miles each day. i swam. i can benchpress about a thousand pounds now, by the way. after that, i set out to kill the ceo of geico, and that is what i did. i strangled him with my bare hands. he was on one of those rolly chairs... as i strangled him, i took him to the ground, and theniwas ceo. that is how it works." he informed me. you didnt really care though. he was hot. that was the main takeaway. he took waht he wanted. this make him mysteriosu

the barkeeper came up and gave us spagheti to share... i was like. Blushes!!! i put my hands on my face as my brain raced with the thought me and geico lizard would... no! i couldn't think like that. we began eating, and suddenly, the moment was coming...

we were Slurping up the noodle..... and then.... geico lizard bit off his end of the noodle. i almost cried. until then. he kissed me anyway. to me it seemed a little extra that he went through the trouble of biting his end of the noodle off and then kissing me but i told him to go off sis.

as i was adjusting my scrunchy, i realized i had dropped my hydroflask. geico lizard must have realized too, because we both got on the ground to pick it up. our foreheads collided and we looked at each other, laughign. i looked into geico lizard's eyes, then at his lips. i shook my head and then picked up my hydroflask.

after a while, we paid the bill and then walked out. as we got into geico lizard's weird secondhand faded red honda accord with a broken light and no license plates, he looked at me. he drove to his home

shoking nobody we were now at the geico building but a acave this was ahis home not actually the geico building whoops teehee. then.... geico lizard unbuckled (his. seatbelt Pervert!!!). he looked over at mye passionately. we then facebattled

after we had facebattled we then walked inside........................................................................................................ uwu!

what we did in his bedroom? i'll never tell. you know you love me. xoxo, i fucked the geico lizard

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