The harsh reality.

Recent Event

((CoUGH YeS hellO ahem -w-))

Ok some thighs that happened recently:
•School started
•Moms out of rehab but going back due to relapse
•I'm finally moving out of my grandmas house soon!! ^^
•I'm moving in with my dad
•I found out that I have a trigger and I will write about this for right now

Ok so my trigger is being yelled at. I can't stand it.
"OH BUT HOW DID YOU FIND OUT HUH"
aheM the only way a person can find out obviously. So my moms been "home" for a bit and I was walking into the kitchen to make dinner and me and my mom we were arguing about something so dumb I don't even remember what it was about. Yet the only thing I remember was my mom saying "Go to your room now" I gave her a disgusted look and said
"WHY?"
"Because I said so"
"Yea but why"
"I swear to god go to your god damn room now I thought I would get some respect or something but no you never listen to me. Now go to your room!"
At that time I wasn't phased and all I did was ok then I walked to my room like I was told or let's say yelled to do.
I shut my door and stared at my room. It was a mess cause mY was packing to go back to rehab. I thought  she dosent deserve my respect after making my life absolute shit. I say on my bed then I thought about what my mom said. I started to kinda remember all the other times I was yelled at before. It made me remember when I was 8. My breath started getting faster and faster I started to cry but the thoughts wouldn't stop. I couldn't stop myself from saying "I'm sorry" repeatedly. I stayed in my room having what I think was a panic attack. I called my girlfriend and she helped me calm
down. It took a little longer than usual. I really owe her for everything. :)

AnyWHO the thoughts still haven't stopped so it's been going on for a few days now. Just really down in the dumps. Like I said I really just use this book for venting. See yA 👋🏼

Pic I did for another vent :P