diary

Day 4

26th August 19
a tiring Monday
18:13 › evening

things are going better than usual, maybe it's because I choose to ignore all those hate remarks that they've been shooting at me, or maybe it's because I can't simply be bothered by their jealously anymore. in all honesty, I do look forward to leaving this dreadful school since the people here have nothing but arrogance and ignorance. I grew up knowing nothing of what a sweet life was like and all I ever wanted were friends to talk to, to voice out all the pain and anger that I have bottled up inside of me, in my little piggy bank of emotions that would break soon if everything goes on as it is now. dance practices are definitely not getting any easier, my legs are always worn out by the end of the lesson, causing me to sway side to side as I walk unsteadily towards my home. someone told me that he looked up to me, just because I never gave up and I that was the best thing that I've heard for the past 8 months but I had to tell him the truth. "I hide my pain behind this happy face, some people do not deserve to know about what I have gone through, " that's what I said to him, with tears slowly flowing from my eyes... although I was not expecting a reply from the young person, he simply added, "that's why you're an inspiration, you manage to smile while you're in pain and it's beautiful". usually, I would have just walked away as I know that cliché speeches are just to make you feel better but this time, I stayed and looked with him with such curiosity in my eyes and smiled, the sweetest smile that I could muster. for goodness sake, I don't know when was the last time when I smiled so much. thank you god for letting that one statement make my day. thank you

- hui li