Idiosyncrasy (Harry Styles AU)

39

Harry's POV

It's overcast and gross outside; typical England. But the weather seems to match my mood. It seems to know what I'm about to do. Or maybe God does, and he's sending rain to mourn my loss.

I jot down a quick, but heartfelt letter to Bethany, telling her how sorry I am but that this needed to be done. I also tell her to take care of Whiskers and her kitten and make sure they get good homes.

I try to hold back the river of tears that threatened to spill as I take a taxi to the London Bridge. What keeps the tears back is the thought of falling through the air; flying like a bird. Free like the smoke from my cigarette. The feeling of utter numbness as I hit the water, then nothing; complete peace.

Soon, I find myself at the base of the bridge, looking at the angry swirling water beneath me. I take a few deep breaths and begin to climb the spiral staircase that leads to the top. My heartbeat picks up at every step I climb, and soon I'm on the verge of a panic attack.

But I manage to swallow my fear, taking some more deep breaths. Once I reach the top, I open the door and step out onto the ledge.

The first thing that hits my senses is the wind. It smells heavily of salt water, and whips around through my hair playfully, as if saying "come play with me!"

"I will soon," I whisper, shivering involuntarily. Soon, I'll be sailing through the air with the wind, free as a bird.

Oh, what a twisted paradise.

The angry water hundreds of feet below me swirls loudly, beckoning me also. The city is breathtakingly gorgeous tonight, especially from this eagle's perch. The sun has long since gone down, and London's lights sparkle their goodbyes; to the sun, and to me. The tall skyscrapers stand tall, seemingly saluting me one last time.

What a perfect way to go. I think, gripping the pole beside me until my cold knuckles turn white. An amazing view.

Sure, I never really liked the city, but I had to admit that it was pretty damn beautiful at night.

I bite my lip hard, nearly drawing blood. I step on the ledge and smile a goodbye at the twinkling lights. I prepare myself to jump, getting ready to feel the wind in my hair, pulling me down to the water.

Then suddenly, the door behind me bursts open, making me gasp and almost knocking me from my lofty perch.

I look behind me at a broken looking Bethany steps out beside me, tears streaming down her cheeks. The wind whips her blue hair wildly around her shoulders. The city lights reflect in her teary eyes, making them glisten.

No, Harry. Don't do this to yourself. She's not supposed to be here, remember? You're supposed to be dead and gone, saving her from a rubbish life or even death.

Tears of my own prick the back of my eyes, but I stubbornly brush them away.

"How did you know I was here?" I demand, voice raspy from the cold.

I can't just jump now, not with her here to watch me.

She swallows thickly, brushing her hair from her eyes.

I suddenly feel the urge to brush it away from her; to run my fingers through it, but I push that thought away too.

"I . . . Mike found the letter," she whispered so quietly that the wind nearly drowns her out.

Rain drops begin to sting my cheeks, but I'm not moving.

"Why did you come here?" I demand, voice rising. "You know I'm doing this for your safety. I can't endanger your life anymore."

She shakes her head, more tears pouring from her gorgeous blue eyes.

"Why, Bethany?!" I shout louder; all the frustration I've been holding inside for so long is finally coming to the surface.

She cringes slightly at my tone, but I ignore it. "Because I . . . I love you," she whispers.

I feel as though I've been slapped. How could I have spoken to her like that?

I fight for air as I open my mouth. "You . . . do?" I'm not sure if she heard me, my voice is so small.

But she nods, sobbing and shivering miserably.

I smile slightly, hanging onto the pole for dear life. I don't want to jump anymore. I want to be with Bethany; because when I'm with her, I'm free.

"I love you too, Bambi." And I do, she's made everything make sense. It's all clear to me now.

She closes her eyes at my words, seeming to savor the moment. More sobs escape her throat and she reaches out her hand to me.

"Let me help you down," she says, voice much stronger than before.

I grasped her hand tightly in min, stepping carefully down from the ledge. As soon as I'm down, I pull her shivering body to mine, wrapping my arms protectively around her.

"I love you," I say again, sobbing into her soft hair. It feels amazing to say that.

"I love you too, Harry. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I—"

"No, don't apologize. I'm sorry for scaring you like that and for everything that's happened," I cut her off, cupping her face in my hands. I wipe her tears away with my thumbs.

"You're sorry for everything?" she whispers, chewing her lip with a smirk.

"Well," I grin. "there is one thing I don't regret."

I lean down, placing my lips on hers. The way she kisses back shows me all is forgiven.

Notes

yay he's okayyyy

mkay sorry for the depressing beginning and just so u know i dont promote suicide but i had to put it in the plot cuz u know

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE READS YOU GUYS ARE THE BESTTTT <3 *HANDS YOU GOD STAR*