Right and Wrong

Part 2

She doesn't really know what wakes her, she isn't aware of hearing any sound, just an unconscious need to open her eyes. He's sitting on her window seat, his arms resting on his knees and a faraway expression on his face. The image pulls at some at some distant memory,  just out of her reach. 

"Damon!" she whispers. She doesn't even bother to hide the pleasure in her voice, she's too tired to play games, and god is she glad to see him.

She sits up in bed and watched his unchanging expression with concern. He looks so troubled and lost, and her heart tugs. She hurts for him, she feels his pain. She wonders what she would be like if he was truly happy, if nothing was weighing on his shoulders and he had everything in the world he desired. She ignores the fleeting thought that she would do anything to give him that.

She climbs out of bed and approaches him slowly,  he still hasn't met her eyes, his stormy ones fixed firmly on the floor. 

"Damon." she says softly, his name seemingly the only thing that came out her mouth. This time it's more of a caress than a word.

She crouches down on the floor in front of him, forcing him to look at her. He reluctantly lets his eyes travel over her. If she expected one of his snarky comments about her being on her knees before him, she would be disappointed. He barely acknowledges her. 

"Talk to me Damon." She begs, her voice barely above a whisper.

It scares her to see him like this, she has a feeling that she's seen it before, but she knows she would have remembered. She remembers every second she spends with Damon, the good, the bad, the beautiful... She isn't sure which category  this falls under yet.

"I'm leaving." He murmurs softly, his honey like voice a relief to her ears, until the meaning of his words hit her.

Of all things he could say, he chooses the one thing that would break her.

"What?" she doesn't like the way her voice catches, the way her heart has already sped up and her mind is going into overdrive.

"Is this because of Stefan? Because..." She tries to force her brain to focus enough to form a coherent sentence and is amazed when she manages. All she wants to do is throw her arms around his leg like a four year old and refuse to move. 

"No, Elena..." he pulls her up off the floor gently, the soft touch of his hands against hers burning into her skin. He stands in front of her and runs his hands up her arms and across her shoulders, finally setting them on her cheeks. Holding her face in a way that only he does, she wants to cry  because of how gentle he is, how caring...how right it feels to be so close to him.

"It's not because of Stefan. I'm happy for you." She can actually see it's the truth, he's not happy for himself but he is for her,  it's written all across his face.  "I'm leaving because of me. I just..." He pauses and strokes her cheek with his thumb. "I just need some time." He finishes with a soft smile, echoing her words. The words she never meant,  however many times she tried.

He tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and smiles again. That same damn smile that he's been pulling out all night, the one that breaks her heart because it's so damn painful. And then his hands are falling from her cheeks and she's panicking because he can't leave. She's terrified that she might not find the right words to make him stay. He has to stay.

"Damon wait!" She grabs onto his shirt, knowing that he could easily pull free from her grasp, but needing to do something to hold him in place. "You said...you promised you would never leave." Her voice breaks and her eyes flood with tears and she doesn't even care, because she'll admit to anything to stop him from going. She can't do this without him, she can't handle everything without him. She needs him and if telling him that is what it takes to make him stay, then she'll do it without a second thought. The idea of having to face the world without the knowledge that Damon was there... it was too much. Even when they're fighting or barely talking to each other, he's still around, he's still the one person who she knows that if she really need him, he'll be there. Without that, everything is too cruel and too cold and too wrong.