The Light Behind Your Eyes // Destiel, Sabriel

i. Cocky Assholes and Hospital Rooms

Castiel

"Castiel, are you in there?" a whispered voice distracts me from my journal. I look to Gabriel, slumped against our wall. His breathing is shallow and he's drooling on my carpet. Blood trickles out of his matted hair, mixing with other dirt on the floor.

I nod, before realizing I couldn't be seen. That's just how I like it. "Yes."

"It's me, L, are you okay?" my head aches, but I instinctively force a smile for my older brother, although I'm sure he's out in the hall, staring at my door.

"Uhh, yeah, I should be, but...I'm not sure about Gabriel." I respond, shuffling over to him.

"What? What did dad do?!" Lucifer's frantic voice echoes louder around my room, before falling silent. If dad heard him, there would be trouble.

"I-uhh, you were inside when it happened, but he pushed him down the front stairs," I take a deep breath, my voice shaking as I realize that this could be considerably more serious than I thought. "His head hit the tap for the hose and he passed out. There's a lot of blood."

"Oh, God no. Is he even breathing?" Lucifer whispers frantically.

"Yeah," I move to put my hand under his nose, feeling tiny breaths on my fingers. "He is."

I hear Lucifer sigh. "You need, no; we need to get out of here."

"Where would we go?" I sigh, sliding down my wall to sit beside Gabriel.

"Farther away this time," he promises. Last time we tried to run turned out badly. I was only nine, but Gabriel, Lucifer, Balthazar and myself tried to run.

We made it about a couple blocks before the cops caught us. They wouldn't listen to a word we said, my father's word against four delusional children. One woman, Jody-I think-tried so hard to get us out of there, but she was barely out of school.

"We can't." I feel my throat closing, "We're trapped."

"We can find mom!" Lucifer whispers a bit louder.

"L, I know that you want to believe that she's still alive, somewhere, but, I just..." I want to find her, I really do, but I doubt that after ten years of being missing, she's just going to be alive somehow.

"No. My mother!" Lucifer whispers brokenly.

Oh...

When I was seven, our mother disappeared, so Father conveniently remarried another woman with four children, Lucifer, Gabriel, Michael and Raphael. Together they adopted Balthazar and Anna.

But when she died in a car crash, along with Anna, our father...just went crazy. He told us that if we follow the word of God, everything will be okay. For a bit, I believed him. But now, it's like there isn't even a God anymore, though.

He wouldn't let things like this happen. I glance over at Gabriel, before sliding down the wall further, so that I'm practically lying on the ground.

"I think she's gone." I whisper back. The police couldn't find the bodies, but there's no way they survived the blaze.

Lucifer sighs impatiently. "You're probably right, but, still. I can drive and hot-wire cars. We can take the car, ditch it somewhere and run from there!"

"But, Gabriel." I whisper, frowning when his head slides down the wall to rest on the top of my head. He whimpers, before falling silent.

"Pack your shit; we're going to the nearest hospital." Lucifer growls, reminding me of the real him, not the scared and broken person he was not five minutes ago. "I'm not taking any more of dad's crap!"