My family is cruel to me. They only care about themselves but sometimes they act like they do care about me but they don't and I don't need to know that they care because they just hurt me. That's all they ever want to do sometimes. All the love that we've made is gone. They took me for granted. I was an innocent, kind, angelic, little girl until I grew up into the teen world and for a moment when I was 7 or 8 years old something cruel happened to me it was torture. Let me tell you this it happened during a storm and while I was on my bed as I found out. I found what happened and I found out what it's like. I found out by my symptoms that no one noticed because I was just happy. But then I got depressed all of a sudden because I started to get bullied at school and abused at home I've been through a lot of tough feelings and experiences just as some of you. The love in my family that I've created is now gone. I'm empty and broken but that's not all I am, I'm still her. I'm still that little girl but she's just hiding because she's scared now. She's scared to trust anyone. But I'm still her. The girl who was always loving and caring towards others. The girl who shined like an angel, the girl was once happy all the time and didn't care what others thought about her and to tell you the truth she's still somewhere in there. I'm still her. But now I've been through a lot and she kind of went away for a while, she's still looking to find trust and comfort but now she's been hurt and lied too so many times that it's not the same as it was.
There once was a time where my family actually didn't want to hurt me or actually cared for me. There once was time where everything was good and normal just how it was meant to be but then it had to change because people found out who I really am and what I am. I've changed though. But not a lot. I felt what it's like to be in pain, to be tortured and taken for granted. My family changed everything, they stole a part of me, they took away my trust and who I once was. But it's mostly because of my father he changed me and broke me. I'm too afraid to talk about it because no one believes me. I'm also scared to talk about it because it'll just make everything worse. I don't want it to become worse. It already has. I don't need anymore pain. I understand, I've learned my lesson but right now I just want to cry and forget it all, I want to be not ok. I don't need anyone to help me, because I don't need them, I don't need my family because they say care but they're the ones that have broke my trust. I hope they get that they're not on my mind I don't need to know they care and want to help because they don't. They're just liars. They just waste my time when they end up arguing about it and begging me to let them in. They cry so innocently like they didn't do anything to me but that's not true they think I'm the liar but they are. I never hurt them at least I didn't try to but it's different for them because they meant to. They try to make me feel bad for them but I won't. I'm actually proud of my heart and mind for still surviving this cruelty. It's been played, used, burned and broken but somehow it still works. I'm still here and you're still here. You're a fighter and a survivor or a victim just like me. We can get through it together. There's just some advice from me so I hope you enjoy the rest.
On to the next part.
