Into The Blue || Blue Bloods Fanfiction

10; Terrified

Warning; this chapter is rated M because of a sexual assault incident that happens toward the end.

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It was dark, way past sunset, when Noelle arrived home. It had been a long day, seeing co-workers being let go and watching them exiting the building with a box of their stuff. Even her boss was fired because of all of this, which in her opinion wasn't fair- none of this was- but they needed a fall guy and unfortunately, he was it.

Then there was the run-in with Reed and trying to calm Becky down. It made her sick that he was able to roam around free, while Becky was the one feeling like she was locked up. She was the one having nightmares and having to constantly look over her shoulders. It wasn't fair, and it made her think about her situation with Jimmie way more than she wanted to.

She dragged herself down the narrow hallway toward the front door of her apartment. She paused for a moment when she heard her cell phone ringing from her bag. With a sigh, she slipped her hand inside the bag and pulled it out. She glanced down at her phone and felt her heart flip-flop when she saw it was Jamie calling.

"Hey," she softly said as she answered the call.

"Hey," Jamie said back, his tone matching hers. He was quiet for a moment, while she silently waited to see what he would say next or do next.

He let out a sigh. "I'm sorry, Nol."

She remained silent, wondering exactly what he was apologizing for; was it the kiss the night before, for leaving without saying a word, for taking so long to call her or all of the above?

"Don't be mad at me," he pleaded the longer she remained quiet. He could never stand it when she was angry with him growing up.

On the bright side, times before when she was mad, it never lasted long. He could always crack a joke to make her smile or if that didn't work there was always tickling her. Neither one of those would work right now though since they were on the phone and he wasn't in the mood for joking.

"I'm not mad at you, Jamie." She sighed and leaned back against the front door. "I'm just...honestly I don't know what I am." She blew out another sigh. "I'm-I'm confused and I'm scared...last night changed things and I'm so terrified of losing you."

"You're not going to lose me, Nol," he promised her.

"How can I not?" she questioned. "Things are never going to be the same between us. I'm always going to remember last night; I'm going to remember that moment we kissed and how it made me feel and all you're going to remember is that it was a mistake-"

"When did I ever say it was a mistake?" he cut her off to ask.

"Your absence this morning did," she answered, feeling the hurt just as much now as she did when she woke up and saw the couch was empty.

She opened her mouth to say something else, but before she could, she lowered her eyebrows in concern when she heard a noise coming from the other side of the door, inside her apartment.

"Nol?" Jamie questioned when he heard her breathing pick up. "Nol, what's going on?"

"No," Noelle breathed out as she took a few cautious steps back from the door. "It-It can't be."

"Nol, what is it?" he asked, starting to worry for her. He could tell from the tone of her voice that something had scared her. "Nol, hey, listen to me, okay? Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"He's-He's here," she whimpered, knowing in her heart that Jimmie was on the other side of the door.

"Who? Who is there?" he asked, really starting to freak out. "Nol, talk to me!"