Is Love Enough To Make You Trust Again?

Chapter 3

I stayed at Tita Lea’s house for almost an hour. Continuously sobbing and I never thought I could stop myself from crying because the pain I was feeling was unbearable. I got up and I was about to leave when Tita stopped me.

“Yan, where are you going?” she asked. “Gusto mo bang si Manong Elyas mo nalang pagdadriven ko ng sasakyan mo? I was worried, Yana. I know what my son did to you was unforgivable.” she continued.

I know that she was worried because I could feel it. She was hurt as well because of what he did. His son did. But if I would stay here any longer I have nothing to feel but the pain would be doubled. It still Lander’s house. Apparently, we had some memories together here. I looked at Tita Lea’s worried face.

“I’d get going, Tita. I know you’re thinking for my sake but I really need to be alone right now.” I said

“Please call me when you got home.” she said looking at me.

“Okay po.” I lied. I never intend to go straight home. I don’t want to fill our home of this sadness I have.

I went out from their house. Every step I made felt like I stepped out from his life. He was been my life. Why do we need to end this here? Did I really did something wrong that was why he fell out of love on me?

I got inside my car and started the engine. I didn’t know where to go because right now what I knew I was doing was crying my heart out. It felt like I do not have the capacity of living when my heart was dead.

Nagdrive lang ako nang nagdrive. Hindi ko alam kung saan na ako nakarating. Ang alam ko lang ngayon ay ang umiyak ng umiyak at malayo sa lugar kung saan halos may alaala kaming dalawa. Hindi ko alam na mabilis na pala ang pagpatakbo ko ng sasakyan. Suddenly, I halted the steering wheel. Muntik na akong makabangga ng tao. Muntik na akong may mapatay. Pero imbes na bumaba ako at tanungi kung okay lang ba yung nakamotorsiklo at may kasakay na babae. Nanatili ako sa loob ng sasakyan na umiiyak pa din. Gusto ko ba talagang mandamay ng tao kung gusto ko nang mamatay na lang?

“Miss! Miss! Bumaba ka diyan!” sigaw ng lalaki. Nakayuko lang ako sa manibela. Umiiyak pa din hindi ko alam kung hanggang kailan matatapos ang pagtulo ng luha ko.

“Miss, ano ba?! Pag hindi ka bumaba diyan sisirain ko to ang bintana mo!” I made my car’s window downed but nanatili parin akong nakayuko. Nahihiya ako sa sarili ko.

“Kuya, tama na yan. Tumatawag na sa akin si Mommy. Daddy and Granpa’s looking at us now. Kuya, hayaan mo na yan! Please ayokong mapagalitan.” sigaw ng babae. Hindi ko na tiningnan kung sino dahil nahihiya akong tumingin dahil muntik ko na silang mapatay.

“Wait!” sigaw niya sa babae. “Miss kung gusto mong magpakamatay sa susunod huwag kang mandamay ng ibang tao!” sigaw ng lalaki. Alam kong muntik na silang madisgrasya dahil sa akin pero masaya sana kung namatay na lang ako.

I looked at him. Alam kong hindi pa siya umaalis sa labas ng sasakyan ko dahil hindi ko pa narinig yung pag andar ng motorsiklo niya.

“Look. I am very much sorry if muntik ko na kayong masagasaan. I didn’t intended to do it. But awhile ago when you said if I wanted to die. Yes, it was better if I die right now, anyway. But, I never want to involve innocent people in my dying tricks if you think of me that way. I am very sorry.” i said to him looking straight in his eyes even my eyes were blurry because of this unending tears.

He looked at me wide eyes. I didn’t know why but I had seen in him shock reaction. I don’t know why and I don’t want to know why.

“Kuya! Ano ba? Hinahanap na nga tayo nina Daddy!” muling sumigaw ang babae. Tinignan ko parang maiihi na nga siya sa pagpanic. Naramdaman kong tumingin ulit yung lalaki sa akin at sumakay na ulit siya sa motorsiklo niya at marahas na pinaandar ng mabilis.