You're mine|Ethan Dolan

Part fiftynine

(Maddison's p.o.v.)
~1 week later~

I couldn't help but to almost cry when looking at myself in the mirror. I was disgusted by how I looked and how I felt in my body. But I had to face it. My body wasn't going to suddenly change over night, nor was I ever going to be truly happy when looking at myself.

Some people might want a body figure like mine, some could think that the contrast between thick and thin was beautiful. But for some reason, I don't. I hate it. And the truth is, I think I always will. Nobody could ever been one thousand percent confident with the way they look... whether they hate the shape of their lips, or the shape of their body.

I feel uncomfortable with the way I look. It doesn't matter what other people think, because I'm not happy with my body. My friends and my best friends can call me pretty, and even my boyfriend can call me the most beautiful girl in the world, and it still doesn't mean anything to me, because in my head, I am not proud of the way I look.

I ignore the fact that Ethan was laying on my bed in the other room, and I locked the bathroom door. I turned the shower on, that way it could drown out the noise of me forcing all the contents of my stomach out into the toilet bowl... the majority being water as that is the only thing I've really consumed today.

I know I shouldn't be doing this. And I know that this is in no way the best thing to do. But at times like these... at times where I have no hope in being happy with myself, I feel as though I have no choice.

I flush the chain as I stand up, immediately heading over to the faucet to rinse out my mouth and brush my teeth. I then strip down out of the clothes I had been wearing all day at school, and step in to the now steamy shower, allowing my self to relax.
~•~•~
(30 minutes later.)

"Nice hoodie, it looks cute on you." Ethan grins as I step out the bathroom, drying my hair with a towel. I look down to see that I was wearing the hoodie he had given me that night at the party... the party where James drug me. I was also wearing a pair of black spandex shorts underneath.

He was sitting on my bed with his back propped up against my head board, scrolling through his phone. Sitting loosely around his waist were a pair of grey sweatpants he had found in the drawer of Grayson's clothes.

"Thanks," I say smiling jokingly, "I got it from some random homeless guy. I think his name was Esmond or something. And I must say, he's a very good looking guy." I say sarcastically.

He places his phone down beside him before speaking, "Oh... is that so?" He grinned, watching me as a tied my hair up into a bun after applying products to it. "Because that's crazy. I remember giving this beautiful girl a jumper very similar to this one. But that's beside the point right now, tell me more about this good looking Esmond guy." He jokes playfully.

"Oh he's amazing. And he definitely knows what he's doing with those grey sweatpants." I laughed, getting into the bed beside him.

"What? Grayson's sweatpants?" He questioned seriously, completely breaking out of the joke.

"Oh come onnn" I huff, rolling my eyes. I sit up next to him, crossing my legs as I face him. "What does that matter. They're pants. And they look good on you." I giggle, trying to lighten his mood, but he looked slightly pissed for some reason.

"If they look good on me... they must look good on my identical twin brother." He told me.

"You're kidding right?" I say, looking him dead in the eyes, but he didn't say anything. "E. I would never think of Grayson that way. And I've never seen Grayson that way. Trust me." I say, laying down beside him.