From Autumn to Winter: A Winterwidow College AU

Sunday at 7:00

James

Did that just happen? I mean, if it did, I'm not sure what "that" was. Whatever it was, it was so preeminent. Comforting Natasha felt so nice. I mean, it obviously was awful to see her that way, but comforting her felt meaningful. Whenever I try to express sympathy for someone, I never really know what to say. I never know how to express that I feel bad. With Natasha, it was precisely the opposite. I felt as if I knew what to say and do. Listen and just be there.

It didn't feel needlessly romantic either. And yeah, I left out the part where she kissed me, but the girls had enough embarrassment for one day. I felt like I was comforting my best friend. She just...felt... why is this so hard to articulate? She just... she needed a shoulder to cry on. I had a free shoulder.

Natasha is in the shower currently, and I'm starting to unpack. I got out and put away the few dishes I had. The next thing on my list was to put actual sheets on my bed. I grabbed the folded pile of bedding and tiptoed into the bedroom. My bathroom is of course through my room, so I have to be very quiet so Natasha doesn't think I'm in there just to hear her shower...or something like that. I don't know. It just seems weird, okay? Anyway, as I am trying to figure out my fitted sheet, I hear something. Something beautiful and calming. It was Natasha. She was singing.

I don't know what the song was, but I don't care. All I know is that suddenly I was halfway across the room and next to the bathroom door. There was something about her singing that just made me want to listen to it for hours. It was silvery and fluid. She was quiet, but I could still hear her voice reverberating off the walls of the bathroom. I slide down the door and sit on the ground with my back against it. Just listening. Taking in her muffled and disembodied voice from beyond the door. I don't know what was special about it. Her singing voice was just soothing. I have no idea if she is "objectively" good, but right now, her voice is everything I need. I heard the water shut off and hurriedly got up. I went back to putting the sheets on the bed.

When Natasha opened the door, she just stopped in her tracks. I took in her new look. She was wearing the cheap, black, tank top and dark blue jeans I bought at Walmart at five in the morning with my jean jacket and her old clothes folded over her arm. The outfit showcases how athletic she is. I don't know what I expected from a ballet major. She has muscular arms and legs, and her shoulders are broad, however she's very slim. Natasha's hair is glossy and a bit tangled from the shower, the water turning it a cherry red color.

She stares at me with wide eyes, but they don't convey that she is scared. More surprised than anything else. She flashes the faintest smile, but it's gone as quickly as it came. "How much did you here?" she asks incredulously. "How ever much you wanted me to hear." I respond.

She smirks, but looks at the floor. "You have a beautiful voice, Natasha." I said softly. She jerks her head up. She's not grinning, but it's close. "Thank you for everything, James. Really." I let a smile creep across my face. Maybe if I smile in front of her, she'll smile in front of me too someday. "Is there anything I can do to pay you back for being so kind to me?" she asked somewhat timidly. I thought about it. I could do it if I really wanted to. I don't though. I really, really want to. "You could have dinner with me?" I asked.

She suddenly went ashen. Her eyes went wide. This time with fear. "No," I said trying to salvage my ask. "That came out wrong. I meant to maybe talk about...you know...our problems. Just as friends." Her eyes became normal sized again, but she did not relax. "Um... Thank you, James." I knew there was a rejection coming. I'll just save her the time. "No is a fine answer. I get it." I said with maybe a hint of disappointment in my voice. She nodded and walked out without saying another word.

I heard the door close. Just as I was sitting down on the bed to wallow in my shame, I heard a knock at the door again. Pulling myself up off the bed, I wondered who it could be. When I opened the door, Natasha was standing there. "Does Sunday at seven a.m. work?" she asked before I could say anything. "Uh... sure. Sunday is great. I know a good coffee shop. Um...here." I grabbed a pad of paper and pen that were sitting on the counter. I wrote the name and the street it was on. I didn't know the exact location, but I tried my best. "Great." she responded quietly. Then she turned around and walked the other way before turning on her heel and coming back one more time. "Your jacket." she said as she started to remove the denim. I hadn't even noticed she had put it on. I quickly put my hands up. "Give it to me on Sunday. You can keep it until then." I grinned.

She opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it again. "Hey," I reassured her. "It's New York in late October. You're going to get cold if you don't wear it." She seemed to consider this for a moment. Then she nodded, and walked away. I watched her as she walked down the stairs and out to the street. She didn't look up again. However, once she was out of my sight, I heard her footsteps stop about midway down the stairs. It was quiet for a moment, and then I heard her start walking again. I listened until I couldn't hear her anymore. I realized I was grinning ear to ear. And I had a good reason.