PART II : LOST
• chapter twenty-three •
So, in September of 2010, I packed my bags.
"Have you got everything?" she asked.
I nodded. "Yeah. Bags, ticket, money, cheap phone, Liam's book, jacket. What else do I need?"
She placed her hands on her hips. "I don't know. Face cream?" She stared into the distance, thinking.
"You'll be okay, won't you?" I asked.
She rolled her eyes. "Of course, bitch. I was alive before you came and I'll be alive after you go. More than alive, actually. You helped me post my videos online. I could get a proper job now. I might even get an offer to record my own song," she said dreamily.
I smiled, and hugged her tightly. "Keep in touch, okay?"
"Okay," she said. "I love you."
"Lesbian," I teased. She pinched my bum. I slapped her hand away.
I had the window seat in the plane, and for half a second I had a flashback of my first flight, when I was going to Louisville and Sam had told me that the window seat was for me.
Sam. I had more than 50 messages from her on Skype. After I had come back here, I hadn't really bothered to check my messages. My phone was gone; my laptop, which was given to me by Window to the Soul had been taken away after my scholarship ended; and Sana's laptop had virus, so it had become too slow. Moreover, she couldn't afford a good wi-fi connection. Initially, I had opened Skype with it (it took ten minutes just to turn the computer on) and there was one message from Sharon, saying that she had reached NY and asking for my address. I told her that I was living with Sana.
And then I never bothered to open that stupid, slow laptop again. Who would send me messages, anyway? But when Sana and I went home that day after eating burgers in the washroom, I opened Skype and found that there were more than 50 messages from Sam and more than 200 messages from...Liam. Both of them had started messaging me 4 months ago. Liam never had Skype. Looked like he'd made an account specially for me, just so he could find me. I cried, but I didn't reply— I was going to surprise him. I went to his profile. He had put up our prom photo. For one hour, I read all his messages. They were mostly where are you, I'm alive, I've been looking for you, please come back, I miss you, I love you. I cried more. I read Sam's messages, and they were along the same lines: where the hell are you, your boyfriend is looking for you etc. etc. And when I opened my mail, well, again there were a hundred of them from Liam.
God, I had been so stupid! If only I had opened the computer before, I could've been able to meet him 4 months ago. I could've looked into his grey eyes, could've touched him, could've kissed him 4 months ago. I shuddered upon thinking what would've happened had I not gone to the bookstore that day.
The only mystery that remained was, where had he been for the seven months before that?
I took out Frozen Hearts from my bag and started reading.
When my flight landed, I took a cab to Brooklyn and checked into the cheapest hotel I could find— Hotel Indigo. The room was small and colorful. But the room didn't matter. I wasn't going to spend much time here anyway. I put my suitcases down, locked the room and went downstairs to take another cab.
"Where d'you wanna go?" the driver asked.
"Union Avenue." This was all I could remember about our apartment.
"Where in Union Ave?"
"Uh...Starbucks," I said randomly, and the car moved forward. I had no idea what I was going to do when I got there. When the car stopped, I paid the driver the exact amount he asked for. He raised his eyebrows. "I'm sorry," I said. "I would love to give you a tip but I really don't have any money."
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