𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐲, chanoey. [ᵈⁱˢᶜᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ]

v. the one where nathans gone

♡

rachel, monica, phoebe, chandler, joey, and ross all intriguingly surrounded the television.
evelyn bursted through the door, resulting in all of her friends to look over to her.
"what's got you all smiley?" phoebe looked over at the giggly blonde.
"you just comin' from nathan's?" monica tilted her head at evelyn.
evelyn just bit her lip and proudly nodded her head.
"he's leaving for a few days so i really needed that," evelyn giddily made her way to the living room, quickly sitting in between phoebe and monica.
"oh, she's coming up! she's coming up!" rachel yelled, turning up the volume on the tv.
"folks, when we come back we'll be talking about her new book, 'euphoria unbound': the always interesting nora tyler bing. you might wanna put the kids to bed for this one," the tv show host introduced chandler's mom on the tv.
"y'know, we don't have to watch this. weekend at bernie's is on showtime, hbo, and cinemax," chandler tried to convince his friends as they all sat watching, but only him looking away.
"no way, forget it!" rachel yelled keeping her eyes on the screen.
"chandler, i gotta tell you, i love your mom's books! i love her books! i cannot get on a plane without one! i mean, this is so cool!" rachel added on ecstatically.
"yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool if you're eleven years old and all your friends are passing around page 79 of 'mistress bitch'," chandler scoffed at her now barely watching the tv with the rest of the gang.
"awe poor baby chandler," evelyn fake pouted, walking to the back of the couch to hold hands with chandler.
"hey hey hey! she's on!" phoebe yelled, watching chandler's mom walk across the screen.
"this is kind of embarrassing, but occasionally after i've been intimate with a man," mrs. bing began.
"now why would she say that's embarrassing?" chandler sarcastically asked, but all of his friends shushed him because they were so into the story.
"i just get this craving for kung pow chicken," mrs. bing confessed, resulting in many reactions from the gang.
"THATS TOO MUCH INFORMATION!"
"i'm leaving for new york tomorrow, which i hate- but i get to see my son, who i love."
"oh yes! i love seeing everyones' parents!" evelyn gushed while having her arms crossed across her heart.
"yeah and strangely–they love seeing you too," monica replied with her eyebrows furrowed and a some-what forced smile.

♡

"i am famished. what do i want?" nora contemplated looking at the menu. everyone else sat at the table looking for what they wanted to eat as well.
"please god don't let it be kung pow chicken," chandler sarcastically pleaded.
"oh, you watched the show! what'd you think?" nora asked intrigued.
"well, i think you need to come out of your shell just a little."
"well, the rest of us thought you were great. we love you," evelyn complimented mrs. bing while jokingly giving chandler a dirty look.
"oh, c'mon, shut up, it's fun. well, i think we're ready for some tequila," nora brushed off chandler's negativity.
"i know i am," chandler jokingly, but seriously commented.
evelyn nudged chandler's shoulder because of his smart remarks towards his mother. nora smirked as she saw the action and the look chandler gave evelyn back.
"so uh chandler, anything going on in your love life? the ladies must be all over you," his mother asked, thinking he'd say something about him and evelyn.
"oh yeah, they're everywhere. can't get enough of them," chandler sarcastically answered with a hint of sadness in his tone.
evelyn playfully rolled her eyes at chandler's snarky comments.
the shots had arrived and almost everyone had taken a few.
"will you guys excuse me, i have to go to the bathroom," evelyn excused herself after having a few shots herself.
"she's your girlfriend, right?" nora asked chandler leaning in, but still loud enough for the table to hear.
"u-uh no, actually," chandler nervously admitted as all of his friends watched the interaction.
"well just between the way you talk about her and then seeing the way she is with you it's just hard to believe you two aren't an item," nora continued, oblivious to how sensitive the topic was for both chandler and joey.
"well uh no, we're not a thing," chandler quickly blurted out so he could end the conversation sooner.
luckily, evelyn walked back to the table allowing the conversation about her to stop.
"why is everyone so quiet?" evelyn asked since no one had spoken in way too many seconds.
"well you see, uhm-it's that—mrs. bing do you know that ross's ex-wife is a lesbian?" monica stumbled on her words trying to avoid the question.
"wow you are terrible at this," rachel scoffed causing everyone, even evelyn to laugh.
"anyways, mrs. bing, i have to tell you, i've read everything you've ever written. no, i mean it! i mean, when i read euphoria at midnight, all i wanted to do was become a writer," rachel smoothly changed the subject.
"oh, please, honey, listen, if i can do it, anybody can. you just start with half a dozen european cities, throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia, and bam! you have got yourself a book," nora explained proudly.
"my mother, ladies and gentlemen."
✧
"you're so mean to your mom," evelyn lightly joked as her and chandler were back at the apartment on the balcony later that night.
"i mean you could have her as mother in law and seen why i am the way i am," chandler joked back.
evelyn just playfully rolled her eyes at him and nudged his shoulder.
"you think any of us will end up like my mom?" chandler looked over to evelyn.
"if i had to put money on it, i'd bet on rachel," evelyn giggled as her eyes made their way back into the starry night. 

♡

"evelyn you need to come out of your soon eventually. you haven't left your room since last night and it's 3pm!" monica knocked lightly at her door with rachel behind her for support.
"do it for the children!" phoebe yelled. rachel and monica glared at her until she added,
"the kindergartners, duh."
"what's the point?" evelyn slightly yelled back to them, ignoring what phoebe had said.
"nathan's out of town and i just miss him."
"if she were dating joey this wouldn't be an issue," phoebe scoffed to rachel and monica as she walked towards the door.
"just go get joey!" rachel insisted monica gritting her teeth.
monica walked out of the apartment storming into chandler and joey's.
"get your ass out here trib—" monica stormed into the apartment but cut herself off when she saw all of the guys awkwardly standing in the apartment in silence.
"who the hell died?" monica sarcastically let out.
"well we were just telling chandler how p—okay i cant do this, chandler i kissed your mom," ross finally admitted.
"what?" chandler and monica freaked out in unison.
"i was really upset about rachel, and i think i had too much tequila, and nora- um, mrs. mom-your bing-was just being nice, y'know, and-but nothing happened, nothing-ask joey, joey, uh, came in-"
"you knew about this?" chandler freaked out at joey.
"okay, joey it's your lucky day because i need you in the apartment," monica saved him, dragging him to her apartment by his wrist.
"get in there and get her out. i need to ask to borrow her shoes," rachel pointed to the door, getting a little quiet on that last part.
joey frantically walked over to the door, thanking god that monica walked in and saved him a lecture from chandler.
"hey," joey spoke softly as he opened her door.
"do you knock?" evelyn rolled over from looking towards her wall to now looking at joey.
"look who's talking," joey joked, but then snapped back to his comforting tone.
"are you okay?"
"well, i just miss nathan. he hasn't even called. you know, this is the first time i've ever been in an actual relationship? i know we had our fling but with him it's just a little 'realer'," evelyn vented to the calmed down boy, him then wrapping his arm around her waist and bringing her into his torso.
"i'm proud of you for finally being in a mature relationship," joey comfortingly kissed her forehead while slowly taking in the soft moment the two were having.
evelyn then lifted her head to now be looking at joey.
"yeah. i never really thought we would go somewhere so i kind of had to move on," evelyn bit her lip, hoping joey would spill something about how he felt about her.
"yeah," joey held back all of his emotions for the girl he loved, accepting she was in a loving relationship that gave her everything he couldn't.
"do you think the girls are listening?" joey took in the embrace, realizing that they would never be able to do it again once nathan found out about his and evelyn's past.
"oh they definitely are. saves me time for having to explain what's wrong," evelyn shrugged and laid her head on joey's shoulder.

♡

the next day phoebe was due to perform at central perk. she finished her set and chandler had walked into the coffee shop.
"what was that?" chandler asked after seeing some girls run out of the door.
"oh, uh–," ross began.
"yeah, i believe i was talking to joey, alright there, mother-kisser?" chandler cut him off.
"mother-kisser," joey repeated giggling, evelyn pretending to know what was going on from beside him.
"chandler, can i just say something i-i know you're still mad at me, i just wanna say that there were two people there that night. okay? two sets of lips," ross tried to defend himself.
"yes, well, i expect this from her. okay? she's always been a freudian nightmare."
ross and chandler continued to fight about ross kissing mrs. bing until ross somehow convinced chandler to confront his mom about everything's she's ever done to him.
and so he did.

♡

"okay. now this is just the first chapter, and i want your absolute honest opinion. oh, oh, and on page two, he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'," rachel handed out her novel to all of her friends to read.
"what's a 'niffle'?"
"you usually find them on the 'heaving beasts'," joey answered her, keeping his eyes on the paper.
"alright, alright, so I'm not a great typist," rachel defended her novel.
"wait, did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? tell ya, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!" ross joked.
"alright, that's it! give it back! that's it!"
"no! i want to keep reading about the niffles!" evelyn jokingly pleaded as rachel started collecting her pages back.

♡
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1798 words
a/n: whew chile i have not updated this book in SO long and it was one of my favorites so i'm going to try and bring it back :)