melting together again (tordedd)

9

A week had passed by since Tord was allowed to leave the hospital. From what I knew, they asked him to go and seek professional help which Tord was definitively not doing. Though I was concerned for his mental health I decided not to push him to do something. The thing he now needed the most were friends.

Tom and I had told Matt about all this. He seemed rather hesitant about it, but he trusted us enough to give Tord a second chance. Especially after Tord had apologized to Matt and even Tom for all the things he had done.

Right now all of us were in Matt's apartment, watching a movie. Since Tord had had a flashback last time we watched an action movie, all of us decided a slasher movie would be better.

Every now and then I glanced over to Tord who sat right next to me. He smiled and though it was hardly visible it caused me to giggle quietly.

In the past few days Tord had gotten better and this time I was sure it was for real. While he still got his panic attacks and flashbacks he talked more with me about it. He told me when something was bothering him. It made me happy to see him laugh or joke. It made me happy to see Tom, Matt and Tord talking to each other like in the old times.

Quite suddenly Tord turned his head towards me. Instantly I looked at the TV screen. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw him tilting his head as if he were confused by my actions. The light from the TV reflected in his bright gray eyes when he focused back on the movie. I felt my face heating up while my pulse picked up a couple notches at the sight of his smile.

I looked at the floor. What was happening with me?

Before I could dwell on this question however, I felt someone shifting next to me. Tord as well as Matt and Tom had stood up which led me to the conclusion the movie had ended.

"That was a great movie", Tom stated. "Ah, I don't know. The special effects were pretty cheap", Tord replied, a smug smirk creeping on his face. Tom rolled his "eyes" before saying that this movie was low-budget. And before I knew it, they started bickering and mocking each other. It reminded me of the times back in high school. Pictures crossed through my mind. That was when I realized something.

I still didn't know what was on the old flash drive I had found in the album. Why? Because I had had no time to watch it in the past few weeks. Though I now had a theory as to what was on there.

"Hey Edd." Recognizing Tord's voice I looked up at him. He then asked if we could go home. "Y-yeah", I replied, standing up. Why do I stutter? What the hell is happening to me?

Shaking these question out of my head I went over to Tord before we said goodbye to our friends. Then we made our way to my apartment. Once we were inside Tord announced he'd go to sleep. I simply nodded to indicate that I understood. "I think I'm gonna go to bed too." I glanced over to the clock which showed that it was around 1am. It had been a while since I was up this late.

"Good Night Edd." "Night Tord." With that I opened the door to my room and went inside. As carefully as possible I closed the door.

I walked over to my bed though before I laid down I reached for the photo album which was on the nightstand. After I turned the lights on I flipped through the pages until I came across that very familiar flash drive. Then I got to my desk where my laptop stood. It was on, like always.

A few moments later I opened the one and only file on the flash drive. Instantly the video player opened. One look at the time bar at the bottom told me it was a short video. Before I started it I plugged my headphones in as to not disturb Tord.

The video started and I immediately knew it was filmed in my old house. I heard giggles which obviously came from my mother. I knew it since she always recorded things I had done.

She walked towards my old room. Ignoring the "don't enter" sign she quietly opened the door. And almost instantly after she had done this I felt my face heat up again.

Tord and I were dancing together.

Due to my hair covering my face in the video I concluded it was filmed when I was I ninth grade. Though it could be later, but my mind was unable to process this thought. "See? It's not that hard." Tord said in the video, smiling at me. At this point I stared at the screen wide-eyed. I was sure my face was red as a tomato now. "Yeah."

Oh my god. Now I remembered. This was filmed a few days prior to my aunt's wedding and my mum wanted me to learn the waltz. I had told Tord about that and he had asked me if I wanted him to teach me how to dance. This thought alone made my heart skip a beat. Back then I had accepted his offer without hesitation. Back then I was way to oblivious to the fact that this could be interpreted in a romantic way.

But now, all I can do is watch the video with wide eyes and a fluttering feeling in my stomach. Despite my weak protests my mind wandered of and before I knew it, I imagined this scenario taking place in the present. This only made the warm and fuzzy feeling inside me stronger. I tried getting these thoughts out of my head, but to no avail.

No matter how hard I tried to not think about it the less it worked. Could it be? It was at this moment that realization hit me:

I had been in love with him ever since the day he had come back after almost three years. This was why I had felt so angry and sad when he had destroyed our home. This was why I was so joyful when I had found him on the streets. This was why I wanted him to get better. If Tord was sad I was sad and when he was content, I was too.

It reminded me of something my mother had said when I was younger. "Once you find the one, you want to do everything to make them happy."

I wanted to shout it out to the world but since it was so late I couldn't, so I just grinned like an idiot.

The only question now was:

Does he feel the same? The thought of him not loving me back caused the fluffy feeling inside me to vanish. Instead it was replaced with a deep sadness. He probably didn't feel the same. I'd destroy our friendship if I confessed to him.

After all, going from friends to lovers might worked in the rom-coms but the reality was:

It would never work in real life.