Letters to Teacher

Chapter Four

Dean checked his watch for the tenth time. It was only 7:30. He had said he would be here by 7 but he was going to give it until 8. If he didn't show up by 8, Dean would get back into his car and head to the bar. Hell, he was dressed to impress. So, he was going to impress someone tonight, even if it wasn't the person he was hoping for.

By time 7:50 rolled around, Dean decided this was not going to happen. He half understood but the other half of him was incredibly angry. How can someone tell you that they love you and then not even show up? Dean knew he was pressuring him into meeting him but still, it broke his heart a little.

Dean pushed himself off of his car and walked around to the driver's side door. Just as he was about to get in, Dean could hear a vehicle coming up behind him. Part of him got excited, but the logical part of him was sure it was a couple of teenagers who had come up here to make out in private.

Dean shook his head and climbed into his car. He had given up. Starting the engine, Dean went to put his car in reverse so that he could turn around, but the other car was directly behind him, the bright headlights shining in his rear view mirror.

"Shit," Dean muttered, turning off his car.

Dean took a deep breath before getting out of his car once again. He shut the door but didn't move. He waited for whoever was parked behind him, in the giant black truck, to make themselves known or to move out of his way so he could leave.

The driver of the truck killed the engine but left their headlights on, making it hard for Dean to see whoever was stepping out of the vehicle. It all very very horror movie, like he should get into his car and lock the doors, but he couldn't move. What if this was him? Dean needed for it to be him.

"Hello, Dean."

Dean could make out the voice long before he saw the person. It was Castiel Novak. It was hard to mistake that voice. It was deep and raspy and Dean had always felt like it was the kind of voice that could make the boy money if he decided to use it to his advantage. Was he meeting Castiel Novak? Was Castiel who he had been talking to all along? He wanted to say that would disappoint him, but honestly, that was like winning the lottery after all of this.

"Cas?" Dean asked, stepping forward until he could make out Castiel's face.

"Not what you expected right?"

"I didn't let myself expect anything," Dean admitted. "Saved me from being embarrassed if I was wrong."

"Oh," Castiel looked around, clearly just as nervous as Dean was.

"You want to maybe sit and talk?"

"Yeah," Castiel nodded. "I would like that. But, it's kind of cold out here."

"Yeah. I didn't really consider the weather." Dean just thought about a secluded spot. "I can get my car warmed up and we can sit in there. If you want?"

"That will work," Castiel smiled.

Dean climbed into his car, Castiel sliding himself into the passenger seat. It only took the impala a few minutes to warm up, since it wasn't that long ago that it was running. He then turned the middle vents toward Castiel.

"I really don't know what to say," Dean admitted. He knew he wanted this but at the same time, it was incredibly awkward.

"Yeah. It's kind of strange."

"We should be able to do this," Dean laughed. "We talked for hours every day."

"Um." Castiel looked around, his hands running nervously over his thighs. "Are you disappointed it's me?"

"What?" Dean was shocked. "Why would I be disappointed?"

"I know I am not the best looking guy around."

"Bullshit." Dean turned to face Castiel, one leg now bent up on the seat. "You're amazing. I am far from disappointed."

"I almost didn't come," Castiel admitted. "I am leaving in a few days. It would have been easier to go with you not knowing who I was."

"I'm glad you came though."

"Really?" Castiel was doing his best to not make eye contact.

"Of course." Dean reached out and grabbed Castiel's hand, thankful that he didn't pull away. "I meant what I said."

"About what?"

"Loving you."

"I meant it too." Castiel spoke quietly, finally bringing his eyes up to meet with Dean's. "But that doesn't change anything. I still have to leave."

"There aren't any other options?"

"No," Castiel shook his head. "I tried to find a way to stay but my mother feels this move will be good for me."

"How is moving at the end of your senior year good for you?"

"I don't really have any friends or a social life," Castiel sighed. "She thinks a fresh start might give me those things."

"You have me," Dean squeezed Castiel's hand.

"I don't think my mother would find that as a reason for me to stay."

"Yeah," Dean sighed. "It would probably make her get you out of here sooner."

"That's why we have to stop talking." Castiel pulled his hand away. "It will be easier that way."

"For who?"

Dean knew Castiel was moving away. He wasn't happy about it but it was happening. They could find a way to make it work. People have made long distance work before.

"I don't know."

"We can still talk," Dean suggested. "We can text and talk on the phone. We can try to make this work."

"I don't want to try and make this work." Castiel was on the verge of yelling. "Every day, it ate me up that I was so close to you and couldn't have you. If I am state's away and can't even see you, it'll kill me. It's too much. I can't do it."

"Cas, please," Dean begged.

"Goodbye, Dean."

Castiel opened the door and climbed out. Dean knew he should let him go. He didn't want to make this situation worse. If he angered Castiel, it could cause him to report Dean. But none of that really seemed to matter considering Sea was now chasing Castiel toward his truck.

"Cas, wait."

"Just let me go."

So Dean did. He let him go.