truly madly deeply

[eng] nostalgic ➳ nakajima yuto x yamada ryosuke

genre: fluff
pair: nakajima yuto x yamada ryosuke
warning: grammar errors, lacks of vocab, trashy plot

**

yuto is his best friend. they've been friends since they started their first steps. every yamada's memories consist of yuto, and vice versa. there were happy times, there were bad times, but they happily jumped through it together.

yamada remembered walking side by side with yuto, down the alley, wearing the same uniform from the prestigious high school. he remembered the way yuto's pout sent him laughing giddily because he's just too cute, especially when he whined about how hard the math homework is. he always ended up in yuto's room all night long after that, teaching him to finish one formula to another.

he remembered on one certain night, he was teaching the clueless yuto about algorithm but suddenly needs to stop because yuto vomited. yamada never been the best at dealing with someone who's sick, but he patiently rubbed yuto's back and cleaned up the mess afterwards. he remembered yuto looked so defeated and so yamada decided to take care of him.

but that night, yuto's grip on his hand was so tight—like he didn't want yamada to go everywhere.

but that night, yuto's whisper was so helpless—like he was afraid that yamada would leave him anytime soon.

but that night, yuto's silent mumbles left yamada stunned like a rock. he wanted to trust that it's just a “sick-person-mumbles” thing.

but it's not.

because after that night, everything went down hill for both of them. yamada felt awkward everytime yuto were 1 miles away from him. and yuto was trying so hard to win yamada's back, as his friend, or as someone new in his life.

because on that one certain night, yuto confessed to him:

“i can't live without you, yama-chan.

let me be part of your world.

i'm so scared that one day, you, among all of these people, would leave me alone.

please, stay by my side.

don't ever let me go.”

but, as long as yamada remembers, he himself wasn't that dumb to push yuto away. because it's so clear that: he cannot leave without yuto too.

and now, here he is, lying on the bed, wrapped in strong arms, feeling nostalgic, remembering everything that had happened in the past.

“ryosuke?” yuto sounds like he's so dead to this world, but still there's a concern on his tone. “you awake?”

ryosuke just gives him a silent mumble as an answer.

“another nightmare?”

“no,” yamada let himself sniffed yuto's neck, smelling soap that yuto shared with him. “i was just thinking.”

“about?”

yamada chuckles. “you really wanna know?”

yuto groans. “come on, ryosuke.”

“i was thinking,” yamada paused, kissing his boyfriend's pulse before continuing, “about how much i love you.”

he could sense that yuto's body got stiffen after that, but it didn't take him so long to realize what yamada's said and finally tighten the hugs.

“thanks for loving me back.”

suddenly, yamada's heart filled with lots of fireworks now.

“i love you, to the moon and back.”

yuto's muffled voice sounds really cute and yamada can't help to smile.

god, thanks for letting him to be the love of my life.