Young and Stupid

Maybe it was really his fault... afterall, he did believed those words despite the other saying them when they were young and stupid with the world...

It was a school day or rather a weekday that day, Friday to be exact, as he had said those sweet and innocent words that plunged the black haired student's thoughts for a long time. A simple, "I love you," that Shouta should have brushed off as it was his best friend's endearing way to say his own thanks or good bye as the [Hair color] haired male smiling softly at him-- but no, the tired male didn't brush it off and he had paid the price for it.

Aizawa Shouta was one for logic. He is a young man who thinks practically and isn't one for having stupid, idiotic and meaningless thinking like some of his friends he was stucked with. Yet, despite it, the black haired male thought to himself as a complete and utter fool.

If Shouta would've shared these kind of thoughts to his friends on himself, they would immediately shout in protest and say that it's none sense thinking since he was one of the smartest in their friend group, heck, even their own class, but whatever those idiots try say to him, the black haired male wouldn't changed his mind. He thinks that he is a complete and utter fool.

A blind and stupid idiot for believing himself on maybe his best friend words were true that day...

Aizawa Shouta was a complete and utter fool, he was really. Maybe he shouldn't have gotten his hopes up. Maybe he should have just brushed the [Hair color] haired male's words that day. Maybe if he had did those, he wouldn't be kneeling in the floor of his apartment's bathroom, gripping the sides of the toilet bowl as he was hacking up pink petals that shows that what he feels...

Wasn't reciprocated...

'Idiot.' Shouta thought to himself as he felt the burning sensation on his chest where his heart is. Where the flowers were growing is. 'Stupid.' He thought as he gripped his shirt tightly as that sickening bile was rising back as he closed his eyes and gritted his teeth. 'Dumbass.' Shouta couldn't hold it in as he forcedly vomited pink petals that were mixed with saliva and something red.

It was blood and the black haired knew that as he could practically taste its metallic and unsavory flavor of his own blood as he took shaky breathes of air before he hacks up those petals again. He opened his eyes and he just thinks to himself on how things had hapoened for him to be in this way.

Tears brimmed in the corner of his eyes as he thought of the thing he unfortunately has. Hanahaki disease. A disease that had the victim slowly have a flower growing inside them where if it blooms fully, they die. The disease starts with the victim coughing up flower petal, one to four petals and the petals also depends on the flower the victim is coughing out as it can be any type of flower. As the victim starts with coughing out flower petals, it then slowly have them coughing out more until they begin to vomit out more petals and when it gets worst, the petals would get soiled with blood as they vomited it. In time, the victim would them vomit out a whole flower, making them know that the disease progressed further and they are dangerously close to dying from it. The disease can progress fully from two months to a whole year and if the victim doesn't get a surgery to remove the disease inside of them, they die.

The sad thing about getting the surgery though is that once you get it, you may have a chance to not feel love ever again. It was rather a saddening thing. Yet some others saw this as beautiful from having to being in pain for an emotion for someone. Love. An emotion that the one Shouta had feelings for doesn't for him.

Aizawa Shouta absolutely hated it. The black haired male absolutely hated this disease because it was both painful for him physically and mentally. The former for literally having a flower growing inside his chest, slowly killing him where he was also forced to hack up flower petals until the disease kills him while the latter, because it always reminded Shouta as he is in pain and vomiting the lovely pink petals that [Name]-- his best friend that he unfortunately fallen inlove with, didn't felt the same way.

'He doesn't love you.' The black haired had thought as his mind had momentarily replayed that same memory of that Friday afternoon over again.

"Shouta, stay safe okay? I love you."

"H... he d-doesn't," Shouta had raspily said. His voice cracking from vomiting awhile ago and the realization and pain it brought to him. The black haired teen was gritting his teeth as he gripped his shirt tigher and the other hand that held the side of the toilet bowl also as he felt his chest hurt.

"H-he doesnt... lo... love you," he softly cried to himself as he remembered [Name], the young man who had caused him so much pain. Shouta may have hated this disease that the male had unintentionally caused but the black haired couldn't hate [Name]. He couldn't hate the [Hair color] haired male even if he tried. He loved that stupid idiot so much.

So, so much...

"Shouta, you're the bestest friend ever!"

"H-he sees y-you a... a-as a... as a f... friend," the black haired male reminded himself as he gritted hus teeth from the pain his chest felt. It hurted the tired male greatly. It hurted him so much. It was unbearably. The pain was too much. "H-he doesn't love you!" Shouta screamed to himself as he felt the tears fall. He hated this. He hated this stupid disease. He hated for falli--

'No you don't.' A voice inside his mind had said as Shouta sobbed. 'You fell and you don't hate it.' It said as the black haired male shake his head in disagreement. "I-I hate this!" He growled but the voice inside his mind had said again. 'Did you regret falling for him then?' It asked him and that moment, Shouta felt himself freeze for a second. The tired young man didn't feel that unbearable pain in his chest nor that sickening feeling of about to throw up another batch of flower petals again, no, instead, it suddenly disappeared as his mind was plague with thoughts that left him jumbled.

Did he regret falling in love with [Name]? Did he regret falling for that [Hair color] haired male who was there since they were in kindergarten? The guy who had been him through thick and thin? The one who had always been there for him and make him smile on the stupud antics he does when the black haired male was sad? The one who was just there for him?

"N-no..." Shouta choked out as he was back to reality again. The pain was back and he felt himself going to vomit again. The bile was coming back up as hand that was gripping his shirt quickly left as the black haired male had made his other hand grabbed the other side of the toilet bowl as he hacked up those petals again. Eye shut tight, tears still falling as he vomited.

After awhile of vomiting, the black haired had noticed that this time it was more painful than last time. Shouta was trying to breathe properly again from the forced actions of his body had done from the disease. Slowly, he opened his eyes and looked at the toilet. His heart clenched, mind blank as he froze at what he saw.

Inside the toilet bowl were many bloodied pink petals floating on the water. And there, in the very middle of it all was a whole, pink, bloodied flower...