Vulnerable || Soobin x Huening Kai

in his arms

kai pov.
          It's been days since I've seen soobin. It doesn't matter. He probably has friends to catch up with and goals he needs to keep up on. After all I do think he goes to school.
           I just look out the window and hold in the tears. It's been awhile since ive let it all out. It usually comes out like waves on a stormy night. After awhile the moon just gotta pull itself together  in the end so that other people can swim. I have to pull myself together so that my dad and the people I love can live their lives happily. If I were to disappear would it be so bad. Would it hurt. I feel nothing but the after shock of your heart sinking. It's very emptying but at the same time so much it makes me feel sick.
           After awhile I see a head pop up, Soobin. He give a small smile. I wave, he waves back. He has this look on his face like, hold on imma tell you something. After while he leave the room and I see him springing through the front door. Running straight to my house. Was he going to visit me. My heart begins to shake, butterflies in my stomach and I feel alittle turned on at the same time.
I hear the door bell ring. I hear him talking to my dad and then them laughing. I hear feet, running. He burst into the room.
          "Like the new look. Slutty shirt and a basic white t." He says that in such smuggy way, I just sit in shock.
          "What are not gonna give me a hug." I'm still shocked. How did he make it through my dad?
           "I don't have enough energy," I whispered under my breath. Before I knew it he jumped on top of me and hug me for a good 3 minutes. I teared up but I didn't cry. He would get up, look up and me for a few seconds and kiss my forehead. I've never had anyone kiss me... ANYWHERE. It's always been a dream for someone to even give me some love. He looks at me. This time I know he wants a kiss, a real kiss. I just close my eyes and let him control my body. A few seconds go by and nothing happens, right when I'm about to open my eyes. The kiss happens. It's slow, careful, and just plain out wrong. It only lasted a few seconds. It's felt longer then it should have been.
          "Did you miss me," he says while pushing my hair to the side. I'm just silent with shock, I have nothing to say.
           He set me up in a way that I would be in his arms. He pulled out his phone and told me that we will just videos all night if we wanted to (he knew that I like watching stuff in his phone.)