The Jock and the Bad Boy (COMPLETE)

TEN

I'm in my bedroom with Thayer and I don't know what to do. It's only eleven, and we're both too keyed up to try and sleep. He's running a hand over the books on my bookshelf. I watch him take out a book, open it to a random page, and start to read. It feels like watching him is the only thing of any consequence I've done today.

"I know it's supposed to be pretty, but it doesn't make any goddamn sense," he remarks, snapping the book shut with a huff.

"What is that?" I ask.

"Pride and Prejudice," he replies. "Have you read it?" I shake my head. "Seen the movie?"

"Yeah," I reply, "watched it with Sara awhile ago."

"And what'd you think about it?"

I shrug. "It was sweet. Not a lot happened. Why, what'd you think of it?"

He looks at me a second too long. "I don't know. Fine, I guess."

"Liar!" I giggle. "I bet it's your favorite movie. I bet you can't wait to find your own Mr Darcy -- oh, er, Elizabeth."

He's staring at the ground again and his voice gets quiet. "You, uh... you had it right the first time."

Cool. Cool cool cool. "Right on," I say, like a dad from the 80s. We're back to not talking. "I've got a laptop." Nice. "Do you want to... watch something?"

He nods, and I set my laptop up on my bed. When I look back, he's still by the bookshelf. I wave him over and he walks slowly. Once he gets here, we take turns showing each other the stupidest YouTube videos we can remember and eventually we both fall asleep.

~

I don't stay asleep for too long. When I wake up, my laptop is still on, the clock reads two AM, and I'm terrified. There's a boy in my bed but it's not like that and I'm terrified because I wish it was. I've liked boys before. The argument could even be made that I've liked several. But this is scary because he's here and I don't know if I've ever let myself want something the way I want this. I think I might be thinking too much.

Thayer wakes up. "What's up?" He whispers sleepily. Fuck him for being adorable.

I shake my head. "Nothing," I whisper back.

"You sure?" He replies, "You look pretty upset."

I shrug. "Just... thinking."

"What about?"

I sigh. I can't do this, not right now. It would change everything. If I was smarter, I would shut up. "Everything. Expectations. Everyone thinks they know who I am, but they don't."

"Who are you?" He asks. I should've seen this coming.

-

Better late than never, right? This is the first part of a triple update btw. Thanks for reading!