Lost // h.s short story

12. Fault

// Harry's POV after so long ahahahahaha ok cool um let's just pretend the girl in the photo i put up is not selena yes ok cool again //

-Harry's POV-

Time check, 8 p.m.

I put my hands on either side of the sink and looked up in the mirror, half dead. My eyes were puffy and my nose was red. Brenda gave me sparks, love, all the good in life but she also gave me pain. I just didn't understand why she had to be treated horribly her entire life. She deserves more than that. She deserves the best in life and I want to give her that. But I can't. She doesn't even trust me enough to tell me something that important? I told her to tell me everything. Pretty sure it would've clicked in her mind when I emphasized on it, wouldn't it? She is so brave, so strong, but so weak and so fragile all at once. She drives me crazy and mad but I'm so in love with her. 8 at night and I haven't heard from her. I'm worried sick. Promise not to leave, but we leave.

I scream in anger and looked at my sad reflection. No point being alone in my pity party. Might as well go to a real one. I walked out of the toilet and put on a black shirt, along with my black skinny jeans. Shoving my phone and wallet in the pockets of my jeans, I put on my shoes and left my house. It was so wrong and I knew what trouble I would get into but in that moment I didn't care. Was this how Brenda felt?

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Taking down a shot, that familiar burning sensation was felt in my throat. I didn't care anymore. My shirt stuck to my back as I wiped the droplets of perspiration off the sides of my face with my sleeve.

I don't know how many minutes or hours had passed, but it felt like days without Brenda. That girl got me in this mess. In this mess of worthless guys and caked up girls. I wobbled to the bar and sat down, cupping my face with my hands. I felt someone else's presence beside mine. I lifted my head up and saw some girl that looked so much like Brenda. It might've been my blurry vision but I don't care right now. Brunette, she was. A little more makeup than Brenda would've put on.

"What's a handsome guy like you doing here?" She asked as she placed her hand on my arm flirtatiously.

"To look for pretty girls like you," slurring all of my words. As drunk as I was, I knew I had to walk away before I got into trouble. But I didn't. I didn't even understand what was coming out of my mouth.

I got up and pulled her to the dance floor clumsily. I stopped and turned around to look at her. She placed her hands on my chest as I placed mine on her ass. Why did this all remind me of Brenda? It was like the first time we met. I looked at the girl hungrily and she bit her lip seductively. All like Brenda would. I pulled her close and slammed my lips on hers, tasting her lipstick. There was no spark, no nothing. What was I doing? It took me a kiss back from her to sober up and realize this was all wrong.

This was so wrong.

I pulled away roughly and pushed her back a little. "What's wrong, babe?" She said innocently as she batted her eyelashes. "You... Everything is wrong," I said, shaking my head and backing away. I turned my back from her as I saw some flashes at the corner of my eye. A little too drunk to care, I pushed my way through everyone, not bothering to know if they gave me glares. I pushed through drunken people until I pushed through the exit door. Walking fast, I got to my car soon enough. I got in and slammed the door, feeling my vision blur up once again. I punched the middle of the steering wheel and screamed out in anger at myself for the second time today. I put my head in my hands as I cried out. I was so disgusted with myself.

What have I done...?

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-Brenda's POV-

I stared at the direction of my turned on television, not looking at anything in particular. Just staring in blank space. After Harry flared up at me earlier on, I cried for the first time in awhile. It was the first time I cried for a boy, it was new, it was nice for a change. But I didn't like what caused it. I went home after deciding it wouldn't be nice if someone walked into the pool area and found it filled with tears instead of chlorinated water. It wouldn't be a good idea to walk back into his apartment anyways. It saddened me even more that I didn't have an article of clothing that belonged to him. No matter how much I missed him, I wouldn't have his tee shirt to wear or smell. I was on my own again. It isn't the first time but it felt different. I felt emptier than all the previous times. I cried for the second time when I got home. The third was just before zoning out.

My chain of thoughts broke as my eyes snapped to the television, hearing Harry's name being mentioned.

"Harry Styles was recently seen at a local club with a mystery brunette. Pictures are being displayed below. As you can see, they looked like they were having a bit too much fun making out. But doesn't Harry Styles have a girlfriend? Did they break up or is he cheating on another girl once again? It's up to you guys to thi-"

I shut off the television, breathing out in disbelief. My heart ached even more than it already had and the marks on my cheeks where the dried up tears were at had disappeared because it was then I cried for the fourth time.

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Waking up after crying was a torture. Oh how I would've loved to never have woken up. I had a few seconds of oblivion before reality struck me. Hard. You know when you wake up all blur and confused after something bad happens and then it just comes crashing to you? Yeah. Hate that.

I cried for the fifth time.

It sucks to know that Harry cheated on me. That he kissed another girl and grabbed her dang ass like he does with me. It sickens me. He said he loves me. He said he wouldn't break me. I'd love to know what else are lies.

Wasting my time lying around wasn't an option. Crying for the sixth time wasn't either. But going to Harry's apartment and starting another fight was one.

So that's where I'm going. And I hope he'll be there.

// I don't even know what's a short chapter lol ehhhhhh //