Dee Christy McDaniels was the first to notice the offertory was changing - On the Sunday after Wendy and Mike Winter's wedding.
She had done hair and makeup for The bride (hair up) Nine bridesmaids (plaited in back) , Three mamas (all with extensions), Two aunts (short and beachy) , 4 grammas (curled tight with rollers ) , One great gramma (with a silver wig) , One matron of honor (tresses teased up big) , And a four year old niece who scattered pink flowers.
Wendy had been real generous with the tips Cause Big Mike, little Mike's daddy, Had said he wanted his new lassie To look good in the pics.
So Christy had been plan'n to give a big wad of bills To fatten the church's perennially light till.
Not that she wanted to show off, mind you. But it was a nice feel'n that folks would see she was do'n just fine, thank you.
However, when she went to plunk that roll into the bag, She realized her generosity was hidden inside.
In fact… no one knew who put what in there!
In the old plate, you could easily see When the Mayor's wife short changed the building fund. Or whether Mr. Jenkins had had a good week at the Seed & Feed...
But the bag hid all that.
Unless you held your hand up over top of it… and dropped it in… all our gifts were now secretly given!
And we liked it.
There wasn't a lot of talk bout it… But enough palaver to to settle the issue Before the Deacons got their tongues flap'n in a dither.
So, the Methodists came and stayed And prayed And sang with us Till their new church house was built… Then they thanked us with new silver collection plates… a matched set.. Limned with gilt.
We threw em a dinner and after all the hubbub, Carefully stored those plates in the closet with the old baptism tub.
Which brings us up to the start of this tale.
What happened next Is a mystery still.
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