I Fell In Love With Synyster Gates

Nothing But Pain

Sabal's p.o.v.

'Can we meet? I had no idea it was going to be like this.. we need to talk. Now'  Fuck my life! I thought, reading the message Brian sent me. I replied with an okay.. I'm meeting him in like 15 minutes at the beach. I threw on some sweats and a tank while throwing my hair in a messy bun as well. I walked down the shore to kill time since I lived like 2 minutes away. "Hey" I knew it was him talking to me by his deep voice with a slight accent. Hardly noticable though. It was just amazing. I turned around and almost fell into him we were that close "hey.." I said wiping the few hairs out of my eyes and behind my ears. "I had no idea you were as young as you are.. I mean it doesnt change the way I feel about you but your like, 17 and im 23.. it wouldnt work if we tried" he said carressing my cheek. "And what exactly makes you think I feel or felt the same? I never said we should try, your the one who told me how you feel! I never said shit, and so what if I'm fucking 17 and your 23?! Hell it wouldnt work cause in the end your still my teacher!!" I said tears starting to form in my eyes, truth was I do like him.. alot. "Sabal! Calm down, okay? And your right I-" I cut him off crashing our lips together. At that point I didnt care if he was my teacher I needed to know how he felt and if by kissing him right here right now would help then I'd have to give a try. "I do like you.. but I've never in my life had a guy like me before.. I dont know about you but I'm going to forget this ever happened okay? I'm sorry but I just dont believe you like me, I kissed you to find a reaction and all you did was push me away." I let a tear roll down my face as I was yelling at him cursing like hell. "I was just surprised Sabal I never meant for you to think that! I-" I cut him off yet again by screaming bye and turning to leave until I heard him speak again. "You know what?! Maybe your right, maybe I dont like you.. MAYBE I just wanted to see your reaction!" I got a sick feeling and my heart dropped to my ass as he said those hurtful things to me. "You dont deserve a guy like  me! You care about no one but yourself and THATS why You kissed ME!" he said and stomped off the other direction.

I got home hurt stung in my eyes as I thought about what happned 5 minutes ago. I went upstairs as my dad was just chugging a new bottle of Jack Daniels. I went streight to my bathroom and immediately started to cry as much as I could. I tried not to cut as my wounds were getting worse the more I cut. So I got in the shower and pulled my knees to my chest after bathing and tried to forget about everything, problem was.. I couldnt. I wanted to cut, and badly too. I knew cutting wasnt going to help anything so I just got out of the shower and into my pajamas. My phone was ringning and I didnt have the desire to answer it. I just lay there with my face buried in my pillows once again, in desparate need for a ciggarett. I changed my bottoms into some jean shorts and slipped on my slides with socks, running downstairs before I was late, the store closes at 9:00 p.m. It was 8:50 now. I slammed my car door shut and drove down the road carefully until I heard a screeching sound and I soon blacked out.

I woke up to hear a beeping noise and I could smell the old people and medicine in the air. "Shes awake! Get the doctor!" I heard a faint but familiar voice from a girl.. I opened my eyes fully now and saw Chrissy, Lexi, Kara, Elise was holding my right hand and Marie was holding my left Laura walked up to me and asked if I was feeling okay. "I'm fine, w-what happened?" I asked dumbfounded. She looked at me and opedned her mouth but the words wouldnt come out. "Your were t-boned, the man who hit you was highly intoxicated and will be charged." A woman said I'm guessing who was the nurse. "Will I be okay? When can I go home?" I asked not wanting to be here at all. "You can go home whenever you feel better sweetie youve been asleep for about a week!" at that point I was totally dazed. "W-what a week?!" I asked to be sure I heard right "yepp, but your okay now, us girls told the teachers what happned so you've been excused, no need to worry we'll always be here for you" Marie and Elise said both squeezing my hand more. "Thanks you guys! I love you all" I said and we all group huuged as we were leaving the building. "Your car was totalled, but hey, with our jobs I'm sure we'd have you a much better car in no time!" said Kara with a warm smile.

The next day I felt fine to go to school. I got ready doing the usual hair make-up and brushing my teeth, along with picking out my close and heading out with my bag. I walked into school with alot of people staring at me, they were probably wondering why I was wearing a bunch of casts and bruised and all that shit. I was t-boned from the opposite side thank god. The only bruise I had was on my right thigh. I went to my locker to get my things and soon walked into my 1st period. "Good to have you back babers!" Lexi and Elise said taking me to a seat. I took my books out and started working, before I knew it the bell rang, dissmissing us from class. Everyone slowly exited the class leaving me one of the lasts to go. "Sabal, a word pleas?" Awh hell! I thought to myself as Brian called me to his desk. Once everyone was gone he shut the door and locked it returning to his seat as well. "What? I need to hurry I dont want to be late for class" I said with a bitchy tone, making it just how obviously pissed I was with him. "Look, Sabes, I-" I looked up at him and put my hand on the desk "Dont. Call. Me. Sabes. Why? Because your my teacher, NOT my friend!" I looked back down at my hands as if I just realised I had fingers and I could feel his eyes burning into my skin. "As I was saying, I just wanted to let you know I wont be a teacher here anymore starting next week. I also wanted to say I'm extremely sorry about your accident and especially for my behavior at the beach the other night." I looked up at him and shook my head in disbelief "can I PLEASE go now?" I asked looking right through his eyes "yes.." I didnt care at the moment how he felt, I just wanted to finish the day go home and cut. Damn it was hard not cutting, and I'm not going to give in now either, I'm going to go home and smoke some more, and drink my worries away down at the park. As I inched closer and closer to my house, I wondered what it would be like to be.. normal. Am I normal? No, definately not. My dad left a note on the table, something felt weird even when I first entered the house, it read

Sabal, I've packed my things when you were at school. I'm moved out now and with a woman, we're getting married and having twins together. The house is all yours now, and you old enough to have your own responsibilities as an adult. Bye. ~Donnie~

"What. The. Hell?!" I screamed, not only have my mom left but now my dad too, and for another slut?! Can my life get any worse? I just wanted to cry to punch someone and blow shit up. I knew it wouldnt make things better doing so, so I guess I'll have to deal with it on my own. I'm better off without him honestly. He was nothing but a bad influence and partially the reason I lived in this hell hole of a world! I needed to get away, to run. I have nowhere to hide though. Nowhere to go, to run.. escape from this shitty place others call Earth. I wanted to die.. I'm feeling nothing but pain right now, no one would care if I left or not. Brian doesnt love me, My dad left me and my mom is dead. The only ones who come close are my friends. I hope they dont walk out either.