h a n d s

okay, kaminari.

"im sorry- i didn't mean to.." 

i heard his laugh, oh that laugh. if only i could see his pretty face. 

"its alright shinso, i um- saw you where sitting alone. wanna come chill with me?" 

i looked up from my bony hands slowly and nodded, "that sounds amazing, thank you." i smiled at the thought of getting to sit with denki kaminari, the boy I'm in love with. 

"wanna come out of the stall?" he laughed again, i smiled. 

"oh- oh yeah.. sorry" i opend the cold metal door slowly and there in front of me was denki kaminari. his pointed eyes, his yellow hair, the back marking in his hair that looked like a lightning bolt. everything that made him perfect, standing right in my eyes sight. i looked at him and he looked back at me. looking at him made me feel like it was only me and him in the world, in the whole universe for that matter. just me and kaminari. all of a sudden, all my pain went away. the monster in my stomach was gone, my body didn't ache. i felt happy for once, and its all because i was with denki kaminari. i watched as denki moved his head away from me eyes, he looked to the ground. my cheeks where rosy and warm. "we should go back out then?" denki looked back up at me, i was still looking at him. i nodded, "sounds good..." 

'' back at home, shinso spent lunch with kaminari. '' 

i came home to my parents fighting that evening, they always fight. fighting about money, my dads multiple other girlfriends. i don't understand why they just break up, i can never have people over and when i do my dads off fucking a different girl then my mum. my mum is real depressed and can't go outside. she tells me to eat but i never do. when my mum does make dinner i throw it back up when im done eating. i don't need help. im fine, i feel fine. people think im to skinny. and i think they need to mind their own business. people at school don't think its an issue, i fit in more at school then i do my own home. what's the point of eating? its a waist of time. anyway. school is fine, its always been fine. not good not okay, just fine. the only reason i go to school is to see denki kaminari. he's the only person i think about, i love him with my whole heart. here we go... 

dear denki kaminari.