Don't ask, Don't tell.• Bike/Green Day

19: rocketed

mike felt his head, it felt so free. this was luxury. he had control over one thing, at least.

m: mom i'm leaving

c: where mike

m: i'm just leaving . i'll leave you some money but i'm going away. this isn't for me anymore . i'm tired of the routine.

c: take your money. just don't call me if you're really leaving . if this is it, you stay away. i never want to see you again .

m: yes . i love you more than you know .

c: i love you too, son. good bye.

he felt such a relief reading this over.

this wasn't a result of billie or trè.

for all mike cared, they could have each other. this wasn't the result of heartbreak. mike had been pondering this forever . he wanted something different, and if leaving could give him the satisfaction of the fact that he was independent, fully independent, he was down with it.

he began packing, he just took his clothes in a duffel bag, his shoes, his socks, his money.

he had cocaine in a stash inside his mattress, he figured he'd sell this for money.

he was all packed and ready to go, he left his bed right where it was, his nightstand, his lamp, his poster, but he took his photos.

he had two of him and his mother, and one with trè.

he also had a picture he took of billie. a picture of billie laughing at johnny rocket's.

he wrote a note, for whoever to find. this note he placed under a rock on his windowsill. he figured someone, someone would give a shit to look for him.

he stepped out from his house, locking the door behind him.

his heart was beating so fast as he walked down the street.

he wore a smug smile. everything seemed just right. he walked by johnny rocket's, he stopped in his tracks.

"one last milkshake can't hurt."

he sat in the "bar" area of the restaurant, ordered a strawberry milkshake.

blue jean baby, L.A lady.

the radio sang.

he sipped his milkshake, waiting for the time to pass, for the sun to set.

but oh how it feels so real,
lying here with no one near.
only you and you can hear me,
when I say softly, slowly!

he stood from the chair, turned and in the booth they sat in weeks ago, sat the boy he'd been dreading to see.

billie was drinking a chocolate milkshake, he hadn't recognised mike at all.

billie looked up from his milkshake.

hold me closer, tiny dancer.
count the headlights on the highway...

his eyebrows rose slowly, mike walked slowly towards him.

billie got up from the booth, he stood, his heart going a mile a minute.his ears felt hot, his stomach buzzing.

lay me down in sheets of linen.
you had a busy day today,
hold me closer, tiny dancer.

they held each other, the world kept going around them, their world stopped.

"you hurt me."

count the headlights on the highway,
lay me down in sheets of linen.
you had a busy day today.

"i know." billie spoke into mike's shoulder.

"i missed you."

"where are you going?"

"away."

they pulled apart, billie's eyebrows furrowed.

"n-no, mike. you can't leave."

count the headlights on the highway.

"i promise i'll come back."

lay me down in sheets of linen.

"mike, take me with you."

"no, billie. you have a life back here."

"so do you."

you had a busy day today.

"bye, billie."

mike walked out, billie, tears streaming down his eyes, he threw a wad of bills on the table.

he ran after that tall, lanky boy he'd hurt. he couldn't bear see him leave. god knows what the world would do to him.

the world doesn't care for souls like mike's. the world will rip every ray of sunshine from that boy's heart.

billie had failed him once before. he couldn't stand by and watch mike come back years from now, a mess.

he had to keep mike in oakland. whatever it took.